I just found out. She won’t let me tell anyone and she won’t talk about it. She’s 13 and I’m scared it will escalate. I want to help her but I don’t want to make it worse. I’m the only one who knows. She’s been acting a bit odd recently, saying things like she hates herself and no one will ever like her and she says she’s fine but I don’t know. I just don’t what to do.
You should try to encourage her to talk to you about it.When I told my friends that I self harmed they told me I had two options. I could either be taken by them to a therapist or allow them to stage an intervention.
I ended up giving in and allowed them to take me and it was the best thing I have ever done.Maybe explain to her that you need to tell someone and that you are not doing it to hurt her in anyway at all, you just want to make sure that she is okay and has the support that she needs going through this difficult time.Hope she is okay.
Don't freak out and let her know you are there for her. I've self-harmed before and when people found out all I got was 'why why why' and a major freak out. It just made it worse for me. I was pressured into stopping flat out and forced into therapy. It doesn't work. Just talk to her calmly, then say maybe you should TRY _________. (insert what you think is best for her there) Key word: try. Don't tell her she has to do anything. Hope all goes well; both of you are in my prayers.
I believe you should try to talk to her slowly and try to have her to open up more to you. Please kindly to be there for her if she has problem. Self-hating is quite common, probably because they can't see anything good inside them? I tried to write one note per day about positive thing about my friend who was doing self-harming and it worked quite well (:
Don't rush thing and don't panic. I believe she will eventually understand that you are trying to help her, not to judge her. Make sure to not push her too hard or she will be frightened and disturbed. I hope my opinion can aid you and hope everything turns out well. (:
Sometimes people self harm just to know they are still alive. I used to. And honestly it is an addiction. I'd say encourage them to get help. If encouragement does not work, sometimes letting them know that if they do not get help, you will do it for them. Try telling them everyday that they are worth it. My best friend told me EVERYDAY for three years that I was beautiful and just gave me compliments and was genuine about it and honestly, if I can get through it, so can they. be there for them and don't ever give up.
Get Matched With a Therapist If you would like real online counseling from trained, Licensed, and Certified Professionals, visit our Therapists section to take a questionnaire and be matched with a counselor that's right for you.