Lost on what to do


Sorry if this is too long.
(Okay so a little background. I met this girl online about 3 years ago and we hit it off straight away and became best friends, we talked, played, chatted and skyped each all the time often staying up to the early hours of the morning. This continued for about 6 months and i was falling for her, a lot. We had conversations about everything and anything and i told her how i felt, she said she felt similar but that nothing would ever happen because of the distance (Ireland to England). Then i went on holiday for 2 weeks and she met a new group of people away for our current group of friends and she started playing and talking with them more and more but me and her always stayed close. But in that group she met another boy who she fell for and they were closer together(distance wise) so she gave it go and they have been together and in that time we’ve still stayed just as close but ten once when we were getting too close, this was about September of last year, and she cut me off because things were getting serious with her boyfriend and he was super jealous that we spent just as much time talking and stuff as the two of them did, i never lost my feelings for over that time I still loved her. Then a just before Christmas she finally messaged me and said she regretted ever doing that and that it would never happen again. From then on things were a little awkward because i was always afraid I would lose my bestfriend again and i tried to hide that i still loved but she quickly saw that i still loved her, but for the past few months things started to return to normal and we’re back to talking every day and skyping occasionally when she’s not in school/work/skyping her boyfriend.)

Now more recently im still in love with her and it’s more than ever, she says she cares for me a lot and that im her bestfriend but she doesn’t love me, and there’s no sign of anything changing between her and her boyfriend and if they did breakup she still says nothing would happen between us because of the distance. so lately i’ve been thinking that maybe I should try and move on but in reality i really don’t want because this girl is just perfect to me i could spend the rest of my life with her, she means the world to me and she’s the only person i actually care and would put her before myself. And so the past week i met another girl from the same city as me, at a future you college program. She’s a nice, sweet girl who i think started to like me but i don’t really know because im a terrible flirt/telling if someone is flirting with me, but i really enjoyed talking/hanging out with her. And now i don’t know if i want to try move on and settle almost or stay with the girl i still love.

So i guess im just looking for un-biased opinions and maybe a suggestion on what to do.

Tags: asked June 14, 2015

3 Answers

Once a girl makes it clear that she will never be interested, it will for sure never happen. She doesn't see you like that. Give yourself space to heal and accept that it is okay to love someone who doesn't love you, and she will never be yours. Once you accept it, you'll be okay and you can start focusing on other aspects of your life.
Long distance realtionships are the hardest to keep .. skyping dosent change anything that you can see her if you cant actually feel her. It is the picture you bild up of her but in reality you fo not really know her . She pushed you away the first time before telling you that she might have feelings to you leaving you in unknow but while you were gone she find someone to replace you is she would onluly love you as much as you do not even live but to care for you she would never done that . You can stay of friends but you will be only hopeing that one day it will be more. On your side you have a girl who has feelings for you why dont tou let your self to be happy and give her the opportunity to give you the love and happiness that you deserve. If a person dosent put you first then why do you make them your everything..
Dude a warm in the flesh breathing, touchable, kissable, and even fuckable girl is more of a relationship than someone just online. I know that you can build an emotional attachment online, but I don't see how you could settle for that kind of relationship. I mean people need physical contact. Besides in most cases online people typically edit their personality to be something that they may not be in real life. So you never truly know the person. Go for the real life girl, you will be much better off.