left hanging

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*I’ve talked to plenty of people about my situation but I just need a broader spectrum of opinions(?) since I’ve never gone through this.*

About 3 weeks ago was the end of a 13 month long distance relationship I had, or maybe it was online, I’m not too sure on how you want to classify it. Anyways, I’m not too sure on how to act on it. I have had several conversation with my previous partner and well, it just boiled down to communication, understanding each other, and compatibility. I do have/had feelings for this guy but I don’t feel the need to be with him, if that makes sense. He was an important aspect of my life, for the 2 years we’ve known each other. However, deep, deep down inside me, something isn’t willing to let go per se. I feel perfectly fine in a numbing way and not sure what to do with it. And of course, I would love to move on but part of me doesn’t, if that makes sense.
If any of you have gone through something similar or anything, please help me! I’m just really confused and lost at this point.

Category: asked August 20, 2013

1 Answer

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As much as I want to tell you to go with your gut, I know that's never easy. I'm in a long distance relationship myself and have been for a little more than two years. We've had fights and arguments a lot, and we've taken a break (but not totally broken up y'know?) but it only lasted a few days. I had thoughts like, "Well, I don't really NEED him. But it's nice to know he's there." I'm not sure if you're experiencing that as well, but if you are, I suggest you stay with him. If you honestly think that you guys can get somewhere if you work for it, then try! You're not going to get anywhere if neither of you put in the effort needed. 13 months is a long time to be with someone, and you can't really just "let them go" that easily after talking to someone every day for that long.
But if right now as you're reading this, you're thinking, "Well, we COULD, but..." or, "I know, but..." then don't even bother! If you aren't going to be happy then there's no point. It's like flipping a coin and hoping it lands on a certain side. If it lands on heads, I'll stay with him. But I hope it lands on tails.
And if you do choose to let him go, just know that it's not going to be easy but it'll be worth it in the long run. Letting him go opens your eyes to everything else out there.
I really hope this helped! Good luck in whatever you decide to do! xx