It is all my fault.

Do you believe in Karma?
I didn’t,not for a long time but now I am not so sure. In June of last year I started to work in a crappy job with crappy people for crappy pay and within the first week I quit. To save face I lied to my family and said I was fired and everything was fine… at first, Two months later my mothers seemingly healthy boyfriend (He was basically my father for the last 10 years) died of a heart attack and life sort of spiraled from then on. now we have to sell the home my birth parents bought because my coward of a birth father has decided he is ready to sell the house.
So that is my story I have felt like my father’s death was my fault because I lied to everyone and now I now I feel like I am drifting away from my family and I can’t talk to them because I am ashamed.

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AnonDon

2 Answers

Karma punishes the guilty with something comparable. Death is not comparable to a lie. This was not your fault my dear. None of that is your fault. Perhaps coming clean will make you feel better? Or maybe expressing these feelings to a trusted confidant will. Remember you are valuable, you are wonderful and you are worthy. Some things happen that are out of our control and you should not blame yourself for that.

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Ms. Star Wars

This kind of false associative thinking is extremely harmful. The universe does not have a giant scale to balance, and there is no magic boomerang of action that comes back to you when you throw it.

Because of magical thinking, you are blaming yourself for a person's death when in reality their death had absolutely nothing to do with you whatsoever. You did something you felt guilty for doing, and then a bad thing happened. That is not karma, karma is a definition of magic, magic does not exist, that is called simple coincidence, and contrary to Hollywood, coincidences are very real.

If you'd like to discuss your situation further, my inbox is always open at blahtherapy.com/members/blahmoderator1

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BlahTherapy Moderation

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