Is there anyone else like me?

This might sound slightly depressing and pathetic but here I go anyway. Basically I am incredibly lonely and have been for years now, granted I’m only 17 but I haven’t had a real friend in over 5 years. I classify a real friend to be someone who spontaneously texts/facetimes you and actually enjoys your company and wants to be with you, not the people you hang around in college with. My last friend distanced himself from me because we went to a new school and he realised that me not liking sports and stuff made me weird, he didn’t care when before school but either way he didn’t want to have a ‘weird’ friend so that was the end of it (I was like 12 here)

I do have college friends, but non of them have ever texted me out of college let alone invited me anywhere. The trouble I have is I don’t like going out, I don’t enjoy ‘partying’. Don’t get me wrong, if I’m at a “real” friends house or they’re all at mine, I’d happily get drunk and have a good time with them, but the whole “omg my friend Katy’s cousin has this friend who is having a party and she said I could come, you’ll be allowed as well c’mon it’ll be fun” like that scenario full on makes my heard pound and gives me shortness of breath I hate the thought of it

I basically want a friend who enjoys staying in and spending their free time binge watching tv series/movies and going out in the day and not just night. It’s because of this that I’ve never been in a relationship (well that and the fact I’m not 100% comfortable with my sexuality and I’m so far back in the closet I’m the new prince of Narnia) *and I make shitty jokes* hahaha

Everyone that I have known finds it weird that I enjoy watching tv series as opposed to going out and getting wrecked every weekend, I don’t enjoy that sort of thing and I hate that about myself because I want to meet friends and possibly get into a relationship but I don’t want to have to do things I don’t enjoy to maintain said friendships

I literally sit on my bed at night scrolling through my Facebook feed and see everyone posting selfies and shit of their nights out or even just if they’re hanging out and it makes my heart sink because going this long with no one to talk to has made me incredibly lonely as you can probably imagine

There is also the fact I am a MASSIVE over thinker and have great insecurities that mean that even if I got a friend who say enjoyed both staying in and going out, I’d be constantly paranoid that when they’re out I’d be known as “that weird friend” to their other friends if you know what I mean? I can never let someone in because I can’t ever believe that I am capable of having a friend, you could say that I have trust issues or something idk if I’d agree but I’m starting to

I’m sorry if you’re reading this and you’re going through something a lot more serious, I know what I’m going through is nothing really I just wanted to know if there is anyone out there who is anything similar to me?

Category: Society & Culture Tags: Lonely asked January 28, 2015

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8 Answers

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hahahah yaa that sounds like me.....can anyone say netflix?! :D but I feel the same way except I force myself to go out and your not being unreasonable but maybe if you want friends you should try to branch out and forget about overthinking cause thats gonna be the death of all of us someday instead find something you love like art or latin lol I dont know why I said that...and honestly I use to be the same way everything you just said the tv part especially gotta love skins :) but you should know that your not alone your a not a weird kid, Narnia references are awesome and someday you will find someone who maybe is as weird and cool as you in the best of ways :) stay strong LIVe on <-ryme hahah

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Coolsoda

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I relate to this completely. However, I think it's good that you're not trying to be friends with the "party" type people, because they're usually not very trustworthy or good friends, and they'd probably leave you at the drop of a hat. If you want to make some real friends that will stick with you, I suggest joining some clubs in college and finding people who like the same things you like, and then go from there. I have a few school friends, but we're too busy to really hang out outside of school very much. In fact, in all my life, I think I've only had one or two "real" friends, one of which I've developed a crush on, so... yeah. I'm rambling now, so sorry ^0^

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I'm also an overthinker, especially with social stuff. Here's the 1 thing that we need to remember: You're not responsible for what other people think of you. Because people are going to think whatever they want, and obsessing over it drives you insane - and honestly gets you nowhere with other people. All you're responsible for is being kind and being friendly to people. Those are special qualities in the world today. Believe me, you'll find somebody.

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Scott

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haha wow! This sounds a lot like me! I tried the party scene but it's not my style. I'd rather just sit at home and try and finish all Nine seasons of How I Met Your Mother. Or Archer Or Nautro Or Freaks and Geeks. Basically any show I really start to enjoy. So you're not alone. Just not really looking in the right places. Mainly because we don't like looking. Or at least I don't. I just sit at home. Alone. With my Netflix. So you're not alone. Message me if you want to. I'll try and reply as soon as possible.

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Elijah

You're not alone! You sound a lot like me.

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ClassyPsycho

that's really alot like me, plus i get uncomfortable during face to face conversation and other things,i asked people about that i can't find or make friends and they told me that nowadays there is no such thing as a close friend most relationships are shallow and most friendships don't last forever,i know that sounds a bit hopeless and i personally refuse to think that,but if you did your mind would be at peace.i hope that advice helped.please feel free to message me if you want a friend ^_^

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sillypanda

Well, there are many people who are either exactly the same type or similar to you. so, dont worry about it too much.I also have problems making friends and very bad at social events. Whenever my friends brought me to a networking event or a party, I will be just standing around and not making much contact. However, I managed to make some very good and trustworthy friends which was, funnily, a result out of a silly conflict and misunderstanding. And the friendship has last for 5 years and still ongoing now.My opinion on this is that take it easy and let nature run its course. Being hasty to make a new friend may backfire and hurt you worse than before. You could start out slowly by joining a club that you are interested in and let the people in the club slowly warm up to you.Life has ups and downs. Its really up to you on how you want to run your own life. Keep hanging in there and someday, you will find a rainbow in your life! ;)P.S I'm also a stay-in guy, hoarding tv dramas, movies, animes, mangas and storybooks.

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Kyo

Hey,I can really relate to this problem. I have a really difficult time meeting new people because I like to stay in and even when I do meet new people it usually takes a very long time before I feel close with them. If you want to you can message me as well. I wouldn't mind having someone to chat with and I'm also going through some of the other issues you mentioned.

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Ren

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