I have an 11 year old girl. 2 yrs ago we were at a bday party for her 1 year old twins. At the time my kid was 9 and playing with another little girl. My sister in law screamed at her telling her she can’t go in the house. She came to me teling me she had to go to the bathroom but her aunt wouldnt let her in the house. I had it and wanted to leave. I tried to leave when my MIL stopped me and asked what was wrong. I told her your DIL won’t let my kid in the house. She came out and I told her if she had a problem w/ my kid to talk to me don’t take it out on her. This woman is over 30 yrs old. She told us to leave which I gladly was doing. However, on the way out she went up to my 9 year old and screamed at her at she is a spoiled brat. Til this day she will not apologize for that comment nor will admit she was wrong for saying that. I will not speak to her nor have any interactions with her until she apologizes. Am I wrong? What kind of woman… mother would do that to another woman’s child? I think she’s crazy. She even made my MIL get on her hands and knees to apologize to her.
A person, I don't care who they are, should never treat a child like that or let alone another human being. As a mother you have every right to want to protect your child and family from that kind of harm and yes like the other person said you should talk to her. Just remember that you shouldn't stoop down to her level and get angry or yell. She is wrong in how she treats people and she needs to be told that she is. The only way for you to get closure, even if it's not an apology is to talk to her. If she blows up at you do not react, simply tell her that the conversation will be finished when she calm and then leave. She will have to face her decisions at one point or another and if you always treat her better than she treats you she may realize her mistakes faster.
Talk to this woman, tell her that what happend then still bothers you. Use reason and lock out all emotion when talking to her. Keep asking her questions, use her answers, her own words to prove that your daughter isn't spoiled. You can do this when she starts contradicting herself. Try to use her own reasoning to change the way she sees your daughter. If you can do this she will apologize.