Vent/Listen Chat

is it better to play it safe?

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Should I stay in a relationship with someone who loves me, is loyal, is my best friend, may someday be a good father/husband but has no career goals and there is literally no passion? Or should I look for someone who I feel I couldn’t live without, someone who gives me butterflies and triggers passion in the relationship? Yes I love my boyfriend. I may not be in love with him… But what if he’s the best thing for me and I give it up? Is it better to settle? What if I think I deserve more than I actually deserve?

Category: asked April 16, 2015
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Avatar of Carrie
Carrie
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5 Answers

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I'd say before you do anything too drastic think about this. This is YOUR decision; not ours. If your boyfriend doesn't have any aspirations in life talk to him. Ask him why he doesn't. Maybe the poor boy just doesn't know what he likes in life yet. You never know how this decision will affect you. What if you dump him and find that you really miss him, more than anything? Think about it.
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Avatar of laymny
laymny
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if you think that you're happy with him, then i think you should stay with him. but remember, it is your decision :)
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Avatar of Annelise
Annelise
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Well I may be young but I don't think that i would settle for safe just because it is easy.
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Avatar of AnnieH
AnnieH
666
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Life is too short to play if safe. Do you really picture yourself spending the rest of your life with someone that you've lost interest in long before? No! Haha I think you should just go for it and try to find a guy that makes your heart beat faster and can make the butterflies in your stomach go crazy. Even though this feeling might not last forever, at least you can enjoy it for quite some time. :) I personally love bad boys, and so far, this liking has brought me nothing but fun!
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Avatar of Amanda
Amanda
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The second letter in this reminded me of your question:
http://captainawkward.com/2015/04/16/690-and-691-one-of-lifes-saddest-lessons-is-that-people-dont-have-to-be-awful-or-evil-for-you-to-leave-them/
It could give you some food for thought, and insight in what your situation could evolve into with time if you stay.
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Avatar of rinseandrep
rinseandrep
7,397