I’m not allowed to do anything?

I’m not allowed to do anything, like at all. I’m a 14 year old girl and I’m not allowed to wear shorts, shave my legs or armpits (so that is really embarrassing), go over to friends house or hang out with friends, join extra curricular activities, or even wear shirts that don’t have a collar to school. Judging from this list, I think I’ve made it pretty obvious that I’m also not allowed to date. I’ve tried talking to my parents about it but they just brush me off or get angry. My regular school day looks like this: come home, eat a snack, shower, homework, go to bed. My weekend is like this: eat, watch TV, eat, go to sleep. I’m really frustrated and angry and I just don’t know how to handle this situation. I know they love me and everything, but I’m practically imprisoned.
Any advice?
(P.S I can’t tell anyone about it or my parents will say the usually, “I don’t care what other people say, you’re MY daughter and I can do what I want with you!” and get even angrier. Or they’ll whip me for telling other people.

Category: Family Tags: Parents asked November 21, 2013

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dragonballjackson

11 Answers

I wonder could you discuss this with any adults outside of your family, like a teacher or councellor in your school. You're parents are being totally unreasonable because the things you are talking about are normal teenage activities. Perhaps if they heard it from another adult it might just make them realise that they need to relax their rules and allow you to live a normal teenage life.

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Mike Smith

And yes, my parents ARE very religious. They can't stand gays or science. Like the Theory of evolution.

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dragonballjackson

The shorts thing isn't something to envy for firstly, I'm a fashion student, and I can tell you that there are plenty of outfits you can wear that will make you feel your best without upsetting your parents. Secondly, I also recommend talking to a councilor, they may be able to help.

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PaperBag

I totally feel for you, my parents are really strict as well....it's gotten a bit better now that I'm an adult, just wait it out :) maybe you can move out if it never gets better? Unless you are muslim like me then you stay with your parents til death unless you get married. Imagine that plus strict, controlling parents. Add me and we can talk some more if you want :)

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rubycat

Awww, are some religious folks hurt by me telling the truth? Are your feelings hurt because I recite a verse in the holy scriptures and show that religion can really kill? Have you come perhaps to the realisation that your religion is just as violent as islam? And you think you are punishing me with a negative mark? Why? How? Wake up and think straight!

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Chris

1,067

I struggle with things like this with my parents a lot of the time I am not allowed to go to other peoples houses and not allowed to hang out with friends, If your parents are not listening to you I would advise you to go to a teacher you trust or a councilor as at the age of 14 if I couldnt shave I wouldn't feel confident with myself

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Izzaroo

@mynameistrouble I understand where you are coming from, but as long as the kid is under the parents supervision and control she will be subjected to all those cruel things. And what is the reason behind the way her parents are treating her? Religion. I didn't come here to debate, other people don't like criticism and choose to challenge me.

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Chris

1,067

I don't have any advice. I'm just really sorry you're going through this. They aren't loving you by doing those things at all. Love is gentle and kind. When people are controlling it is out of fear but there is no fear in love. You are not an object. You are their child and a child is a gift. Them doing these things will only manage to drive you away and ruin any chance of them having a relationship with you in the end. At least you are able to reach out here online. I would also try reaching out to anyone you can offline.

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Vivid Melody

1,794

Thank you to everyone that replied. :) It really helps me feel not as alone knowing that other are willing to help me.

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dragonballjackson

-2

Let me guess, your parents are religious?

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Chris

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-6

Religion is the root of ignorance and intolerance, hence the root of all evil. Not surprising that christianity and Islam are very similar in their views and attitudes towards homosexuality and premarital sex. In fact christianity calls for a bride who is not virgin to be stoned to death too in Deuteronomy 22:13-21If I was you I'd call social services and ask for a foster family that is non religious. Sounds cruel but I'm saying this with only love in mind. Parents have actually killed their kids following "biblical" ways of raising your kids.I'm not even going to get into the severe effects that can have on child psychology as it's 4:20 am here.Good luckhttp://www.examiner.com/article/another-child-s-death-linked-to-pearls-and-to-train-up-a-child

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Chris

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