I miss my dad.

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my dad passed away in october. by around that time, we fought a lot. I pushed him away. now all I can do is miss him. I have problems coping with it. I usually turn to self harming, but I’m trying to get myself away from it. can I have suggestions, please?

Category: Tags: asked June 22, 2013

4 Answers

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Losing somebody takes a long time to recover from.. Even though before he passed he knew deep inside you loved him and he loved you too, remember that. I don't recommend this because it half helps your habit, every time you feel like harming yourself, 1) Remove any sharp objects from you room. 2) Take a (If you have one) Washable marker, or sharpie use that instead of using a knife. Or if you have any hobbies, like drawing or anything do those. It'll reset your focus onto something else.I told my ex when I couldn't be there for her if she ever felt like doing it type to me because it will keep her hands busy until I actually had the time to talk about her. Try typing to someone who you can trust until the feeling goes away. You can do it, i'm so sorry for your loss.
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I went through the exact same thing; my dad and I fought a lot then he died very unexpectedly 2 years ago. I was left hating myself for all that time wasted fighting with him. I sought help from a counselor and she helped to make me play out in my head what it would have been like not fighting with him, and imagine talking with him as it could have been. That may seem weird to some, but it also helps to remind yourself that no matter what, you loved each other, and he with always be with you in your memories. Hang in there <3
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I always found comfort in knowing that energy never ceases, it just transfers. What was your dad, same with mine.. is now the sunlight, the wind, rain and rivers. Hes always there, in some form or another.
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I lost my mom November of 2010. We generally got along very well, but she was sick for a long time and it was really hard on me. I didn't always treat her how I should have and it's something that I still regret, but that I try to improve now. Instead of beating yourself up over it, just do your best to treat your mom and everyone else better. Do things that you think would make him proud. Obviously, I don't know what sort of things he'd like to see from you, but just as an example... if he was really big about you doing well in school, strive to make good grades and go on to college, because it would be something that you know would make him proud even if he's not there to see it. I hope this helps, and don't feel like you have to harm yourself. His passing was not your fault, and that's the number one thing you need to remember.