I hate myself for this


So, my friend moved away last year and she and her short time boyfriend broke up, I hated the guy at first like my other friends; well i didn’t actually hate him, because it’s pretty obvious where this is going, I like him. My friend is coming back soon and I don’t know if I should tell the guy, let alone tell my friend. I would just egnore my feelings but the thing is, he is the first guy I’ve had serious feelings for since my last boyfriend. so yeah, I could use some advice…

Category: asked May 8, 2014

7 Answers

Talk to your friend, see what she thinks. I personally think that you shouldn't be with him because it's your friend's ex and that's that. BUT, sometimes, even that doesn't matter. If your friend supports you, go for it. If you don't ask, the answer is always no.
I agree with @TheOneThatGotAway because if it's your friends ex, then it isn't ok. But, talk to her about it, and see what she thinks. She may be ok with it, and she may be really hurt, and even angry about it. If she is angry or upset, I advise you not to date him, if you want your relationship with a friend to last. In my opinion boys should never come between true friendship, because there are always more fish in the sea. If she is ok with it, then sure it's ok. But, make sure she isn't just saying she is ok with it, when she really isn't. She may say she s fine, but deep down it kills her. I really wouldn't date your friends ex, but in the end it is all up to you, and I hope it all works out.
You should tell your friend because if you don't and y'all end up dating, then she'll be pissed. I think you should talk to the guy and ask him if he likes you and if he does, tell him you do too. See where it goes.
go for it. your friend has been away for a year and im pretty sure she moved on.
I disagree with you, xerxezx, because it's pretty much Guy Code and Girl Code NOT to date your friend's ex. So if she's not okay with it, move on. But if she is, and SHE HAS COMPLETELY MOVED ON, then shoot for it. GO! HAVE LOVE! :)
If she has moved on, go for it. It's better to let someone know how you feel than to painfully hold your feelings. It will hinder your friendship, there is no doubt about it. Really this whole 'girl code' 'guy code' thing can be ridiculous sometimes. Maybe they weren't happy, or since it's "short term" maybe they didn't grow as strong. You never know, I say express your feelings because YOU never know what will grow from this. Life is too fickle.
It's pretty simple really. Friends before Guys. Don't be that friend who goes and dates their friends old boyfriend. No, Never okay. Even if they tell you its okay, Feelings will always come up. People will get hurt/Jealous/Angry. You might even lose your friend over it. Its not worth it, Its just a guy.