I feel guilty and don’t want to lead him on…

So basically I have a variety of mental and psychological illnesses that cause me to be very sad, depressed, have anxiety, and basically make me feel like I am completely insane. Only two of my friends know about this, and I would keep it this way, but there is a person who likes me and I like back who is going to ask me out in the near future. He is really nice and funny, but he doesn’t do well when he in serious situations about things that depress people. I feel bad because I don’t want him to go out with me and then one day when I’m really bad I just kind of spring it on him, but I also feel like I’ll chase him away if I tell him upfront and warn him. We’ve been really good friends for a while now, and I really don’t want all of that to just go down the tubes and for him to be scared of me (I say this because people have seen me during a nervous breakdown and have never talked to me again). Any advice on what to do?

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mcc910

7 Answers

I honestly think the best way to do it, is to just tell it to him, but like slowly and make sure he understands. If he leaves you then... well to be honest, you wouldn't want someone who WON'T be there for you, to be in a relationship with you, right?

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Y Z N

1,411

You can ask him what he thinks about depression and similar things that you are going through. I wouldn't tell him that you're going through these things, but rather learn what he thinks about them. If and when you think the time comes to tell him, don't dump everything on him at once give it to him piece by piece.

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Wolfx111

307

Just be honest with him, at the end of the day, if he can't see you through the rough, why should he deserve to see you through the good? When you love or even like a person, it's not fair to pick and choose what parts you like of them, you like them for all of their little quirks. If he can't accept all of you all the time, you should let him go, he wouldn't help you or make you feel any better when you're at your worst.

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blaireybob

well don't say that, it's not always mental illness most of people do things because this is who are they introvert people tend to like things much different than extrovert people do, go ahead get out with hum have fun, but if keep saying that you will not have fun, relief your self from these type of thought and live your life ( appreciate everything and regret nothing )

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Bader

111

You'll eventually need to tell him, but you can wait until things get actually serious, or you know that you two could work out as a couple. So, go on a few dates, get to know him and see him as a potential partner, and if you think it's something that can work out, sit down and have the talk about what does it mean to be with you. I know there's a chance it will push him away, but he has a right to know and hiding it won't stop him from leaving later when he inevitably finds out, if he doesn't want to deal with this; and at the same time you don't have the energy to deal with someone who doesn't know he has to adapt to the circumstances when he interacts with you.

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rinseandrep

7,397

i have a firend who is similar to this but she shares with everybody. anyways, i would say that id he truley likes you then it wont scare him he will want to be with through everything! i say go for it but ease into it!

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HBenson

-3

Take a shit nigga.

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At0mTroll

-6