I don’t understand

You know, i am 15 also. I have depression as you do, have got close to attempts and my mom is also depressed. Pretty much my family has fell apart since my dad passed. But i still look at the good things. I know people these days are scared to talk about religion but i have a question. Who is Jesus to you? If it weren't for Him in my life i would have committed suicide months ago. He can help you just ask Him to and believe He can. I know this may be hard to understand, many people don't understand. God bless you I'll be praying for you.

oh darl you need to as hard as it maybe look at the good things in life and you need to take one thing at a time you really dont need to be thinking about the future but more the now. if you feel everything is getting to much for you take a deep breath and then find something you really enjoy and do that for a while until you feel content just in the present now. Your freind sounds so good im sure if it was to much for him he would tell you but thats what friends are for to be there for you and you to be there for him. if you ever wanna talk just message me i'll be happy to talk to you even just to get stuff of your chest :)

If I can say anything it would be that having the opinion that you work hard to die in the end will bring you down. Try think about it like you work hard in life to give yourself a better chance at happiness. Try to relax and stop putting pressure on yourself, you have one friend and yes it might suck to not be high on the popularity scale but at least you have a friend. You are not alone and it does get better. With regards to your mum, depression is a medical condition and if you are concerned that you have inherited it, go see a doctor and get it on record so they can provide help. Also you have your whole life ahead of you, dont let the hormone induced teenage you control your future happiness. Because trust me, it does get better.