I don’t think I’ll find the person for me.


One of the things that’s been bothering me lately is how limited my options are in any sort of relationship. I’m an asexual panromantic, and i have a hard time telling people about that because people assume that because i’m asexual, i’m not interested in relationships. In reality, i really want to be in a relationship with somebody, i’m just not interested in the sexual aspects of a relationship. How can I find someone who wants to be in a relationship, but who isn’t interested in sex?

Category: Tags: asked July 29, 2014

2 Answers

Have you heard of AVEN (asexuality visibility and education network)? Because if not, you need to look at it right now. Not only is it supportive, but group meet ups are often arranged for asexuals living in the same area. If you are on AVEN, however, then my best advice is to be honest. With everyone. If you are interested in someone romantically, you can have a mature conversation with them about whether their wants and needs are compatible with your own. As a pansexual grey-aromatic, I kind of understand. Being different is always lonely: but relationships aren't necessary for a happy or healthy life. You just have to keep reaching for what you want even when you get let down. Because maybe one day you'll succeed.
I often feel the same way.... I'm somewhere on the ace spectrum (I currently ID as asexual but haven't really had the opportunity to learn anything about my relationship preferences since I've never been in one, I may be gray ace or demisexual but at this time I'm sticking with ace) and although I don't 100% know my romantic orientation, I can see myself being with someone of any gender. Although I have some social problems I also get really lonely sometimes and really want a romantic relationship. I worry that I won't be able to find someone I can have a good relationship with without being pressured into anything sexual. Definitely look into local LGBTQIA+ groups or try and find ace networks, meetups, or groups. I believe there are actually a few dating sites targeted towards asexual individuals as well, I will message you the links!