I don’t like my friend’s fiancé

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I used to enjoy staying at my friend’s apartment for days, but unfortunately she moved in with her boyfriend. She loves him very much and I’m glad she’s so happy, but he is very jealous and when he is around I can’t have a normal conversation with her. If he feels like she isn’t paying enough attention to him he will start kissing and grouping her in front of me or interrupt me while I’m talking to her, and he often say my interests and tastes are stupid or just plain bad. He jokes with me, but when I joke back he gets offended. I feel like I’m walking on eggshells around him.
She’s my oldest friend, but we were never super close because she can be very touchy and quickly gets confused and sad, but non the less I enjoyed what we had, simple as it was. She clearly enjoyed it too because she keeps asking me to come over and spend a weekend with her, but I don’t know how to tell her I don’t want to because her boyfriend makes me uncomfortable. I know one of her other friends feel the same way and told my friend, and she of course told her boyfriend about it and he didn’t take it well.

Category: asked August 12, 2013

5 Answers

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Bad situation you have there. I know that you dont want to break the friendship you have with your friend, after all she is your oldest friend you have. Though you should maybe arrange something to do which wouldnt involve her fiancee, maybe something you and her just used to do before he was around? Though you should tell her how you feel when her partner says something insulting, rude or hurtful to you so she knows how you feel...maybe then she will realize that you and her could maybe do things just you and her so you wont lose the long friendship you both have!
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God, I know how you feel. I'm stuck in a similar situation with one of my friends and her fiance- except my friend knows her beau is doing it and calls him out on it. I'm not sure anything I would suggest would help.
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I know you are reluctant in telling her because she's your oldest friend. You made so many memories with her and I do bet you miss the old times. You should be honest with her and tell her how you feel. Maybe she won't take it well but it's best to tell her you are at least uncomfortable with him. But if she likes him maybe there is something in him that you didn't see. If she is happy maybe you should cheer her on. You still mean a lot to her if she wants to be with you so I'm sure she will hear you out. I hope I helped. I wish you the best of luck!
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I agree with Hannah! I think if you're good friends with her, you should talk to her about how her fiance makes you feel like crap because of the way he talks to you. And their PDA in front of you is rude too. Be honest, and maybe she'll appreciate that too.
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An open communication and honesty is whats needed in all relationships.Talk to your friend,be honest,she will understand.As for never being there when he is,well..thats just never going to work out.As good friends you will have times together with friends and boys friends etc,just how it will be unless some one moved to live in other country lol,so trying to avoid him altogether will not work! So just be honest. Good luck!