How to tell…


Hello, I am a teenager and kinda confused about some things. I know I am bisexual, and I am comfortable with that. But lately I’ve been having more and more dreams in which I am male (I was born a female). I have had dreams like this ever since I was little, but lately they have gotten a lot more common. I have also always had more friends that are guys than girls, but I never really thought much of it. I can’t say that I really have ever felt particularly female, but I don’t really feel male either, although I definitely fit in better among guys.

Thanks for reading,

Category: asked May 8, 2015

3 Answers

It happened to me as well sometimes, dreaming that I'm male, but I'm female, and I'm even hetero. One day I talked to my psychology teacher about a dream I had when I was pregnant with the body of a male, and she told me that probably is just me trying to get out of problems, and yet I feel stuck. Perhaps you're having a hard time in this period, but is just a guessing. Dreams are like an encrypted message, they're never clear, nor they show you your true intent (if they do, you would wake up!), I don' know if you're still in high school, but normally each school has a psychologist for students. They're really helpful, you can try talking to them about your dreams. I hope this was a help, I wish you good luck. :)
I've done that a couple of times as well, sometimes even kissing a girl. I did some research myself ( with my google-fu) and I found that one plausible explanation for it is that there's a part of us women that is masculine. It doesn't necessarily mean that maybe we subconsciously wish to be male. However it's up to you if you believe in the interpretation of dreams.

Don't rush to label yourself love, you don't really need them. Wether you're bi, trans or gender-fluid it doesn't change the person you are. But hey, if it's something you're curious about, you could experiment a bit with being "one of the guys". But like I said, there's no need to rush. I know plenty of girls who have a lot of guy friends, simply because the fact that they get along more and there tend to be less drama that way. Life is about discovering yourself and everything that makes you unique and awesome.

If you wan't more concrete answers or have some other questions about dreams or sexuality and all that, I'm sure there's a teacher you could talk to or perhaps the counselor at school could refer you to someone.

At the end of the day, your happiness and wellbeing is all that matters. Whoever it is that gives it to you.
I am happy to hear that you are comfortable with being bisexual. As the dreams represent our door to unconscious the first thing that will pop into your mind will probably be: well, then it means I actually want to be a male! But, things are more complicated than that. Dreams can represent your affection for women, but can also show up if your hormones are leveling, since women have testosterone as well. I believe the term that is used for not feeling entirely male nor female is gender fluid, but I would suggest not getting into terms that much, but rather practice being self aware and proud of who you are.