how to keep myself safe?

try, by any means, to distract yourself with something you enjoy, may it be a song you love or drawing, reading a book you love, or watching a funny video. but make sure you can distract yourself until you feel safe again.i will say though, when i was in middle school i cried a lot. at some point, i figured out that reading any random text whether it was a sign or a worksheet gave my mind something else to focus on and it helped me calm down. if breathing exercises aren't helping, try distraction exercises.

Try listening to ASMR, it alwys calms me down

A friend of mine had a really bad time and she was always on tumblr and had suicidal and depressive things in her wall her therapist told her to try to surround herself with more positiv things so she changes it. Now she has nature and freedom, all kinds of positive things in her blog and it really changed a lot.I hope this may help you a bit Search pictures that show things you love, that maybe let you dream. I hope you will feel better soon.Best Wishes J.

surround yourself with people who truly love you and will want to help you, God gave everyone a purpose in life and yours awaits you, I really hope you can be MY hero and overcome your suicidal thoughts because you will also be others' heroes as well who did not fight their inner unconscious.

start working on yourself to become a better person, don't be lazy