How do you feel about depression?


Depression is something that doesn’t just go away. It’s just.. there, and you deal with it. It’s like Malaria, or something. Maybe it won’t be cured, but you’ve got to take the medication you’re prescribed, and you stay out of situations that are going to trigger it.

But the thing is that if you relay solely on the medication to manage your depression or anxiety, for example. You’ve done nothing to the mind, so when you’ve finished with the medication, you’re just as vulnerable to relapse as though you had never taken medication.

So, this is my story, and I believe that until you’ve had depression you’re not qualified to speak about it. Luckily, I am, and hopefully you’ll listen. But, of course! Who the fuck am I? Well, I’m your ordinary teenager, 5ft6 ish, dark hair, green/hazel eyes, good family home.

Anyway, my name is Cai, or Vexzn. I’m Sixteen, and born on the tenth of may. But who cares right?! You just want me to get to the point, I know. But, seriously listen. Like most people I have hobbies, strange hobbies, but hobbies. I adore gaming, love design, and hate cleaning, but more importantly I suffer from the dreaded mental illness 1in3 people have, but people know little about, depression. Yep! I hate it. This is by no means a shout for help, a sympathy vote or anything along those lines, this is recovery, and how I deal with it.

But do you know what depression really is, and the true meaning!? I doubt it. I will go through thoughts of suicide everyday, all the little comments made in school or society or even online will run through my head at night when I’m trying to shut off for the night making it almost impossible, and this all resulted in three hours sleep a night.

But, from when I’m writing this another month has passed, and after around two months of battling, my sleeping pattern now allowed me to range from 5-7 hours sleep a night. Which still isn’t normal, but enough.

When this all first started I felt as if I was suffocating everything
seemed much worse than it really was because when my depression physical as well. My head felt like it was a thousand pounds, I’d constantly get headaches.

I‘d think I was the most horrible person in the world, and my therapist would ask me what have I ever done that would make me think that..I sat there blank..I had no idea! But the feelings were real and very scary.

But, do you know what is the worst thing about feeling like this? Family, I constantly get down because it’s not just me this all effects, but my family, and people I live with. – knowing that I was hurting someone always brought me down. But after reading on the internet, I realized, I am not alone and these feelings are very real, and incredibly scary. But, there is help out there, It’s limited but there is help.

Ultimately, would you be in a relationship with someone who has this? What are your thought? I wrote this last year, and I have improved, but my views are still the same.

Category: Tags: asked July 22, 2014

2 Answers

Would I be in a relationship with someone who had depression? To me there are so many other factors that them having depression almost doesn't matter to me. Here is what matters, will they be there for me? do they care about me? do they want to improve themselves? are they honest? personally I have dealt with depression and sometimes its easiest to talk to someone else who has had it. but here is one thing i have noticed. The feelings of inadequacy that come with depression can often kill the relationship in one specific way. The person feeling depressed breaks up with the other because they feel that they are not good enough for them. That is the one thing to be wary of, we are humans and none of us are perfect. We cannot read each others minds and if you are in a relationship they clearly see something in you, if they have a problem they need to tell you it is not your job to read their mind. That being said a lot of what you have described is the perpetuation of negative thoughts, I wish there was an easy way out but often the best way is to keep pushing. It isn't easy at all and its a daily struggle but it does get easier. Remember there are people who want to help, keep pushing forward and sometimes resting to admire the progress you made can help. PM me if you ever want to talk about this or anything else. You have made tremendous steps forward so don't stop now
Being in a relationship with someone who is depressed is not easy. I've been with my boyfriend for 6 years now, and I know it is not an easy thing for him to deal with me being so depressed constantly. Luckily for you, you're overcoming it all, and that is quite fantastic. I on the other hand, am very much devoured by it all. And my boyfriend has no idea what to do with me. He loves me very much and I know he does. I have moments where I understand he loves me and that if he didn't want to be with me, he just plain wouldn't be with me. But then in a split second, I'll see him like a girls picture and I go right back to feeling inadequate, like he needs an out source of normal, pretty girls, so he can escape this broken heap of glass his girlfriend has someone who is depressed can be a very big task to say the least, but if you truly love someone you don't give up right? you sit there and you listen to their irrational fears and you apologize for them having to deal with what cards they've been dealt, and you tell them how upset it makes you seeing them so upset. you make them feel whole, even if it is for only a few hours or a few days. each day it gets better when you constantly have that person there for you who makes you feel like you aren't some creature an author pulled out of a scary book. I agree with the person above, depression shouldn't be a factor on whether or not you want to date someone, you should focus on other things like are we compatible or do they like Chinese food?Finding someone who makes you happy and makes you feel whole, is the best feeling in the world, and I hope that one day you find that person. If you ever need anything, please don't hesitate to contact me. (: