That is how I lost my virginity. I was 14. No one in my family knows and I haven't been able to talk to anyone about it who understands. I had to find it in myself to realize that it wasn't my fault, I was violated, and that I have a say now. Like the others above me have said, it would probably help speaking with a professional about it. If you feel fear, guilt, ashamed, any negative feelings about it, turn it into positive. Get your mind going on something positive for you. You will certainly think about it from time to time, but once you realize it was NOT your fault, you can learn to love yourself again and get past it. You can always talk to me or any of us on here. I know that I'm new, but I've been there. I'd be so happy to sit and talk with you, laugh with you, and cry with you if that's what you needed. I still think about it almost a decade later, but time will heal it and don't let it take years to consume you until you realize it wasn't your fault to begin with and that you may be hurting, but it will heal. You need to confide in someone and have them help you seek help. It will make you feel a lot better to be able to openly talk about what happened because if you just put it in a box and try to act like nothing happened, the bad feelings will consume you and it will always be on your mind and never dealt with. I hope you get the help you need here and elsewhere. Please let me know if you ever need me!
