How could I face being in my position?


I hope someone will relate, but I’m currently the oldest of my generation in my family, and it’s always felt like I’ve got to carry the banner, take the hits, be at the vanguard and open the way for my brother and cousins, it feels as if everyone expects something, every day I’m told how people like me will bring the country up, how people like me will change the world, and every day my mind feels like a beehive, I can’t stop thinking about anything, mental silence is so rare, it feels like a load, even within groups of friends.

Category: Tags: asked July 30, 2015

1 Answer

I'm also the oldest in my family, so I can relate to feeling like there's a bunch of pressure on you to get things right in order to better yourself, honour your family, and set a good example for all those that are younger than you. I think sometimes we and the people around us forget that we're only human, and as such, we're constantly growing and changing. With that comes a whole bunch of stupid decisions, mistakes, and problems that we have to sort through in order to figure out our path in life. We have to be allowed to make choices for ourselves in order to learn. Sometimes those choices result in us screwing up, and that's okay. It's all part of the process of figuring ourselves out.

Have you tried speaking with the people that are putting this excess pressure on you? Especially if they're family members, this may be their way of trying to encourage you to do your best without realizing how much it's negatively affecting you. It's coming from a place of love, but that doesn't make it okay if it means you're finding it difficult to keep up. Maybe you could sit down and have a talk with them and explain exactly the way that you're feeling, and how you need to be allowed to make some choices (and mistakes) without worrying.

You're totally going to change the world someday, but not because you're perfect. It'll be because you obviously care a ton about being great and doing the right thing for yourself and others, both of which are amazing qualities. Don't be afraid to live for yourself and speak your mind. Good luck!