How can I give better advice?

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Sometimes a few of my friends talk about problems that they’re having, and I can’t give them any helpful advice and it makes me quite disappointed in myself for… One of my friends has a problem so similar to one of my own, so I’m pretty useless there. Another friend has started mentioning her home problems to me, which are way out of my hands. And another one asks me but is so clever that she usually figure it all out herself… It doesn’t help that the first two only really feel comfortable talking about their problems over stuff like chats. (They’re not very serious people in person.)

On this site, too. Although I like being confided in, I can’t give good advice. How can I give better advice?

Category: Tags: asked October 10, 2013

3 Answers

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When a friend gives you a problem and wants help, the answer is really simple if you remember a few things. First of all, make sure you explore all options that are open to that situation, so that person can get a better perspective of their problem. Second, sometimes all someone needs is someone they can relate to, so be relatable! Also, make the person feel like they are not alone in their situation, and that there are so many other people out there that are going through the same thing. Basically, all you have to do is be a friend to them and comfort them, because sometimes the best advice isn't saying anything at all; it's just simply being there with them when they need you the most.
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Yea sometimes just listening to their problems is the help they truly need.
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There are some things that us, just regular old people, can't really give advice for because we don't know what it's like and you can't give everyone the perfect advice, we're only human, we haven't experienced everything but when you do give advice, listen. Take it all in and just say what you think you might do in the situation. Don't give them the generic "it's gets better", really personalize your advice to the situation. Don't judge them! When you give advice, leave your bias at the door because when you give advice, it's all about the other person. It's important to remember that. Don't go off on a tangent about your own problems unless it's completely relevant AND helpful to the advice. Never play the 'starving African child' card. It's the worse thing you can do when trying to comfort someone or give them advice. Sometimes, you should know that when people trust in you, they don't want advice, they just want a sympathetic ear, they don't want you to try and fix them. I hope this helps.