How can I be VANILLAAAAAAA!?

Ok so, YES this is another part of my sexuality question.

Link: https://blahtherapy.com/questions/why-cant-i-be-normal/

Alright, just first I wanna say I really appriciate everyone making me feel better and giving me confidence and all that..

But seriously everybody this is the question I’ve been trying to ask!

HOW Can I be vanilla!? Is there some way to rewire your brain to make you enjoy romance and kissing and making out instead of enjoying getting beat up by guys and being tied up LIKE THERE HAS TO BE SOME WAY. IT’S 2014 COME ON D:

I really want to love vanilla stuff, I don’t wanna be a kinky person, and no offense to kinky people I’m not trying to be mean I just don’t think it’s gonna suit me and I’m NOT comfortable with liking it.

I WANNA STOP ENJOYING IT FFS

I WANNA BE VANILLA, NOT CHOCOLATE, OR ICE CREAM SUNDAE GODDAMNIT.

Someone, please, there has to be a guide to this..I don’t wanna end up being a rough sex person..Anyone…
I MEAN SOMEONE CAN TAKE ADVANTAGE OF IT AND RAPE ME!!!!! YOU KNOW HOW FUCKED UP THIS WORLD IS..

Category: Sexuality Tags: dirty help i wanna be normal ice cream kinky normal? vanilla asked October 26, 2014

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Uni

179

3 Answers

Dear, your yourself. You cant change how you like it , ( trust me i tried) but wanting to change because you feel you will be raped? if you feel unsafe sign up for tae kwan doe or something to make you feel safer. Good luck on with your problem.

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sarah-the-crohnie

191

I don't know if you can change that, honestly. I know there's some people out there that consider bdsm as part of their orientation because it's so deeply ingrained to who they are. Would you be happy repressing those feelings? Why do you think it's so important that you change?

If you're afraid that someone is going to take advantage of you because of your desires, it might be good for you to look up warning signs for predators in bdsm (there was a really good post on this at fetlife, but I think you need to be 18+ to use that website so I won't link you). Some people will try to take advantage of you, so it's best to get away from them ASAP and it'll help you to know what to look out for. Definitely stay away from people who don't respect boundaries and safe words. And when you're older, it might do you good to find a local bdsm community and go to munches and stuff so you can talk to people with similar interests and maybe make some good friends who will help look out for you too.

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Bokchoi

181

Young lady, you can't. Stop being ridiculous and ask yourself where this absurd obsession with being vanilla is coming from. What source is telling you that being vanilla is what is going to make you happy? What is telling you that the way you are now is wrong?

You keep asking the same question and getting the same answers. Let that fact sink into your head. What roadblock is preventing you from accepting yourself?

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Humanist Hope

16,417