How am I ever going to make friends?

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I’m going off to college soon, so thankfully, I’ll be away from all of the judgmental people who have been making my life a living nightmare for the past 6 years, but I’m still not sure what I’m going to do once I get to that point. I don’t know where to start. I don’t know how to act. I feel like I have too much emotional baggage to really get close to anyone, and I’m afraid that I’ll end up distancing myself from people, just like I have my entire life. I’m scared, because I just want to find at least one person that I can relate to and can comfort me, and is willing to help lift me out of the void. Or maybe I’m just really selfish for wanting that. I don’t know. I just don’t want to be alone anymore…

Category: asked February 16, 2015

4 Answers

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But... I don't know how to act like myself. I don't really know who I am. I've been having to lie to so many people, I don't even know what the truth is sometimes. All my life, I've felt like a hollow puppet, simply going through the motions and doing what people expect of me. I really don't know who I am or what kinds of people I'll become friend with once I'm no longer restricted by my parents and by my community.
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Think about the person you'd like to be. Think of all the traits you think you have, or would like to have. Would you like to be outgoing? would you like to be a nice, calm, loving person? Do you want to infect others with a smile? Just think about it for a while, think about what you would like to be. And then act like it. Convince yourself you are nice, you are funny, say it over and over again, and in time, it'll come true.Give yourself confidence, be happy, relax, unwind!. Maybe you won't get to vent and be comforted the minute you step into college, but with a nice, positive attitude, anything is possible. You'll make friends in no time, just don't put mental obstacles for yourself saying "I won't.." "I can't..." Negative words are obstacles and we need those out of the way!!Look at yourself in the mirror, Smile at yourself!! Tell yourself how great you look, and even if you don't see anything you like, try concentrating on the "least" worst thing about you! Maybe it's your big beautiful eyes?? Or you might have fantastic hair? no? doesn't matter, look at that awesome skin on dat face, ooh yeah!You've been living in the dark far too long, and you gotta run and jump out that void and into the light, don't think too much about it, don't be scared, don't overthink it! Just DO IT. If stupid people all over the world can live life happily without a care in the world, so can you!! <3 lolLove you, Stranger!! You can hit me up with a message whenever you feel like talking to a pumped up crazy happy person. (Believe me, with all the shit in my life, if i didn't smile, i think i would spontaneously combust!!)Good Luck!!!
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I don't really know if I can find that confidence. I tried very hard in the past to make friends, but for some reason, people always pushed me away. I always feel like I'm doing something wrong or something's wrong with me. I feel inadequate for human affection.
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just be yourself and dont be afraid to socialize with new people. complimenting people is a good way to start conversation, thats how i make most of my friends. once you feel like the person seems loyal enough, then give them bits of information, nothing big at first, just to see if you can trust them. dont hold onto anyone that does shitty things. just be confident and dont be afraid to open up and let people in. good luck, you'll do great :)