I am so depressed right now it is unbelievable! When I look ahead into the future, all I see is me wasting my years as I am now. Everything I want in life I can’t have, and I can’t get on my own. Everyday is such a chore to get through. My family aggravate me to the point of tears and I have absolutely nothing in common with them, like my friends. People say ‘can’t you talk to them?’ but I try to and I don’t get anywhere, and I haven’t got anywhere for 16 years. Life seems to be all about school and education, and my next step in life is school and education and after that is school and education, and then it is work and then it is death, and that is pretty depressing. People say find a hobby, but the only hobbies out there are sports, there is no where I can go to interact with other people who are like me. I want to go out and meet people like me, but there is no where I can go. Instead, I am stuck in the house eating and sitting on the laptop, which is so sad and I don’t like it but it is the only thing I can do to keep myself sane. Like I said before, my friends don’t have the same interests as me, so I can’t go out with them, they go out with the friends who do enjoy the same things as them.
I just want to be happy, but I cannot, and I am impatient because I feel that if I die tommorow, I will look back on my life and realise I screwed it up by dragging myself through school and life while being extremely unhappy. I can’t remember the last time I was really happy, and I can’t see it happening anytime soon. If I could find at least one person to share my interests with, but where am i going to find them?????????
I see no point in carrying on with all this when I am just going to be sad, fat, depressed, regretful and hopeless, with so many dreams but no chance. It is so hard to be happy in life when you are on your own, and i feel like giving up.