Help please. In love with my friend

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I am inlove with one of my new friends(were both girls). We’re classmates in culinary and i just felt someting for her. She’s funny and beautiful and i know a lot of guys like her alot. I dont think shes gay coz her past rel are with boys. But i just dont know why i feel like were flirting with each other, the touches and the glances. When we look at each other, i know theres really something bet us. We always go out as a group but we always make sure wes sit right to each other. We even book a flight together without them knowing. I mean they know shes going somewhere but they didnt know we’ll go together. So i’m just sooo confused right now on what is going on bet.us.

Category: Tags: asked October 13, 2014

5 Answers

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Just let things develop naturally. If she feels the same way you do, she'll find a way to let you know. Just watch for hints, but don't jump to conclusions. Maybe you can talk to her about how she feels about homosexuality, make it a casual conversation. Just because she's only dated guys in the past doesn't necessarily mean anything. Some people take years to admit to themselves who they really are. Some get married and have kids and really do love their spouse/family, but just feel off and don't know why. Getting her to think about it while hinting how you feel on the subject might get her to open up to you.

There's always the worry that you could lose her as a friend, but if you don't do anything, you'll always be questioning things.
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I used to be in a similar situation with one of my best friends a few years ago. However, I was lucky that we both had tumblrs and I was able to send her an anonymous message to ask her what her sexual orientation was (I would have asked her in person, but I didn't want things to be awkward between us if things went wrong). As it turns out, she's straight so nothing really happened and I had to move on. Maybe you should try to find a way to comfortably ask her about her sexual orientation like I did with that anonymous message on tumblr. If you don't have a way to send her anonymous questions over social media but you don't want to flat out ask her about this because you want to avoid the chance of awkwardness, then maybe you can find a subtle way to bring it into a conversation (try to start a conversation about crushes or something).I hope this helps you.
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You said you hung out in groups, right? Is there anyone that might know? Or if that seems to obvious or embaressing, try playing group games that could give you a hint. Like for example, "Never Have I Ever" might get you some answers if your creative with it? I wouldnt just ask her right away. I suggest to just wait a little longer. If you guys start to get really comfortable enough with each other, like start forming a solid friendship where you guys are haning out often, I dont think that would be odd to ask then. And to be honest, if a girl I was becoming friends with asked if I was into girls, I wouldnt be weired out or offended. But everyones different. Dont stress about it now :) Enjoy the friendship now, and when you think its right, ask her.
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There was one time when we're at school and one of our friends ( lets call her A) talk to her about A's guy friend who message her on fb. She told A that she doesnt like him and that A should have told him she's gay. A just laughed and said like ,'oh okay and whos your girlfriend, her? And laughed again. She was referring to me. I was speechless and she just smiled. Also, one time she texted me and told me to make sure not to be absent on our class the next day, or else.. I asked he r why she doesnt want me to be absent, is it coz she'll miss me? She just answered it with a laugh and a smile. So im really confused now.
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'Help'? Sounds like you have what everyone seems to believe is the best of all possible worlds!Relax.