guy troubles?


okay, so I have been dating my wonderful boyfriend for 13 months now. And I love the guy. So this year, I have this one guy in my study hall and i thought he was attractive. So with my friends Ive been jokingly obsessing over him because I knew he would never talk to me and it wouldn’t work out because he had a girlfriend as well. Well, yesterday he DM’d me on instagram, and we started talking, and he’s a pretty cool guy. I’d say at this point we’re friends; but I have no idea if he’s being flirty or if his personality is just that style, you know? And so this weekend is fall break, and since my birthday is coming up he told me he would take me to this movie I would like to see.
I just..I am no cheater. I could never cheat on the love of my life. But I really do want to be friends with this guy. But my boyfriend is very strict and he gets jealous very easily..I basically have no guy friends because of him (whether they have a girlfriend or not, it doesn’t matter to him.) And ugh I have no clue how to feel and what to think. Please be brutally honest with me if that is what you think is needed; I’d love a girl as well as a guy’s point of view on this situation.

Category: Tags: asked October 21, 2014

4 Answers

I completely agree with Bokchoi, you are your own person! It's normal to get a little jealous, but to control you to the point of not allowing you to have guy friends? It's ridiculous. It is OK to have friends of the opposite gender, if he can't see that then maybe it's suggesting his lack of trust? You need to do things for you, sweetheart. If you want to spend time with him, then spend time with him. Don't let your boyfriend deter you from being friends with someone. Whilst I believe you shouldn't be playing with peoples emotions, you shouldn't be dictated to by your boyfriend - someone so important in your life. So many girls are taking this as normal, but it's not at all - it's unhealthy! Do what suits you.
From my point of view on this as a guy, I don't think you should go to the movies alone with him on your birthday! I think if you're not spending your birthday with your family, ATLEAST you should with YOUR BOYFRIEND! Not with a new friend, no, no. Also, if you don't want to develop more and more feelings towards this guy and maybe that would hurt your relationship with your bf, then I'd advise with taking it easy with this new guy and just chat here and there.
Hey Lisa,I could understand your boyfriend would get jealous, although that is something he might need to get over. But it does sound to me that you are playing with fire with this guy. I mean, you have had an eye on him before, things might get complicated in a later stage. Perhaps you could try to meet with other couples, this might be safer for your relationship.
Oh man, I wouldn't let someone I'm dating tell me who I can and can't be friends with. Your boyfriend sounds really controlling and I think it'd be good for him to work on his jealousy problem. You may be dating him, but he doesn't own you. And as you've said, you wouldn't cheat, so your bf should trust you. Guys can be friends with girls and it still be platonic. And you know, if you do end up liking this other guy better you shouldn't have to feel like you need to stay in your old relationship.