Finding yourself


Lately, I’ve been having a lot of trouble with figuring myself out. It’s almost as if my whole body is in war with itself. Brain against heart, thoughts against speech, feelings against emotions…I don’t know whether I do the things that I do to please myself or others. People’s only advice is to “be yourself”. But what if I don’t even know what that is? Any advice, thoughts, comments, help?
Thank You

Category: Tags: asked December 14, 2014

6 Answers

i. feel. the. sam...... like no matter what you do, you just feel not you and you dont know how to get yourself back, or if you ever had yourself. i think every person goes through that stage in some point in their life, sometimes longer than others. and being 'yourself' is obviously the wrong answer, because being 'you' isnt you because you havent found yourself! my suggestion is try every thing you wouldnt. (just dont do something absolutely crazy) just try different things. and that doesnt mean changing who you are, its just molding you into to the person you want to be-if that makes sense. i do absolutely know how you feel, and just know you arent the only person who feels this way.
I understand how "being yourself" or "following your dreams" just doesn't help, when you (or I) don't know what you enjoy doing or aren't sure what your dreams are! I'm trying to enjoy the journey, finding myself rather than trying to get to an answer asap. I've heard it said that people aren't born with a "calling" that they should do, it's something you figure out by trying things and engaging in something, anything. I hope you have a good journey to finding yourself!
It's kind of a long process. I don't know if most people ever consider truly who they are or take any kind of inventory of their values. I got lucky and kind of went through that. I thought about what things in life I value. What traits are intrinsically good, what's worth living for, what is it that I think I need to do in life. Those sorts of things. It took a very long time. And I found it difficult to keep track of it all, so I had to start writing it. I wrote out what it is that I believed on any single thing that came to mind. And through that act, I guess, I seem to have figured out who I am.
It took ages to figure out who I am and I'm really still figuring it out every day as I'm always changing. Here's my advice for you. Explore. Do shit, try on different identities, clothes, obsessions whatever the hell you want (as long as it doesn't hurt you or others). Then you'll be able to find what clicks with you and what doesn't. And if you're never 100% sure? That's fine too! Every second is a new experience that changes us in some little way.
Well you are changing everyday so just be patient and hang in there!!
I feel you. Up until now I still can't find myself. I'm still searching but I don't let the thoughts burden me. I just like, you know, flow with it. I try many things, fill my head with knowledge, befriend with people (I just did now!) so I can see more clearly and in meantime I'll find myself