Ex boyfriend& bestfriend

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If a girl and a guy were seeing eachother for a month then they break up. You fall in love with the guy, date for a year and six months, then you break up with him over txt because you think he doesn’t have any interest in you anymore. You tell him you love him like a friend and he says he does too which is what you thought ( you thought he didn’t like you anymore then a friend anymore). Then you stop talking you start getting sad. You try talking to him but you can’t. You think he’s happier then you. Then you find out he was sad all summer. So you try to talk to him but you can’t and when you call him he doesn’t reply. You txt him and say you want to talk he says ok but nothing comes of it, then your best friend who use to date him starts holding his hand and you start crying and then she’s mad at you because you think she likes him then she tells you that she would never do that to you then she tells you that she’s doing what you did to her two year ago (when her and the guy broke up after there one month time together where they went on one actual date and you asked him to go steady after he asked you to home coming.). Then she starts ignoring you. Then you try to talk to her and she says that you should jump of a bridge before she pushes you. Then your ex fb won’t talk to you and aviods you and all you want to do is talk to him and then he spoons your best friend at a party and then everyone assumes your mad but your not because she can do what ever she wants and you told her when she told you to kill yourself that the only reason you were upset is because he’s happy and your not and your hurt and all your ex best friend thinks is that your being a bitch for not understanding how she feels when she’s not understanding the fact that your trying to be a better person and if you did hurt her then shouldn’t she understand how you feel but she can’t because she never Had her first kiss with him and fell asleep in his arms and Layed with him and watched fire works or kiss in the rain! And all you want to do is talk to him but he won’t even look at you and your to much of a scardey cat to just go talk to him and you have no more friends because they all think your obsessed with your ex and that your self centered and they just don’t like you anymore and you just want to be your old self agian but nothing’s the same. What do you do?

Tags: asked October 30, 2013

3 Answers

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I think the only way to be your old self again is by discovering it on your on. A boy doesn't define you in any way, shape or form and it's more than possible to be yourself without them around. It's much better if you first discover your self; take up some new hobbies, learn new things. Then after you are comfortable with who you are alone, and only then, should you try to start a relationship.
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If you feel this way then I strongly advise you to try and find someone who can make you happy. Even though you really want them to know how you feel about things and they don't understand and even though you want them to notice you and not avoid you, it will be much better to find someone who you can depend on. Then, your ex and best friend would realise that you've changed and you're not the same kind of person i.e. the person who tried to make them realise what you wanted them to realise. You did your best to move on. This will allow them to see that, actually, they just didn't open their eyes and acknowledge what you really felt inside and your ex would also begin perceive the fact that he was wrong (in the sense that he avoided you). If they finally start to act in a better way towards you then try your best to forgive them. These are my thoughts :) x
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I get that you want to talk to him, but I'm not sure why? for closure? because you're missing him? Because you want to try and keep some kind of friendship with him in tact? I would wonder, is his friendship important to you? more important than your friendship with your best friend?
I think it's disgusting that your best friend told you to kill yourself, because of this boy that you've both had feelings for. If I were you I would keep my distance from both of them. Your ex boyfriend clearly isn't interested in keeping the connection between the two of you open, and it might be that your best friend is pressuring him to stay away from you. I also think it sounds like your friend feels threatened by you. She already lost him to you once, and now that she has him back she probably feels like you might try to take him out from under her.
If you are interested in trying to keep the friendship of these two, I would recommend texting or emailing your friend and apologizing if you've done anything to hurt her, but that her behavior has hurt you too. Tell her you'd like to still be friends if that's what she wants. I think it would also be a good idea for you to let her know exactly why you've been trying to talk to your ex-boyfriend. If she knows it's just about closure (if that's what it truly is), then she might not feel so threatened.
I hope this helps a bit! Good luck!
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