desperate 30-something virgin

Don't give up hope. It's all we have.

Hey sweetie, you sound so lovely. I salute you for that! Never compromise who you are, your essence. Someone will come along and love you for all the amazing things you have to offer and you'll be glad there was no one before that person. You are not desperate, these men are missing out! <3

Hi there!
I think i may have a tid-bit for you that might help if you don't mind a little reading.

I want to look at this situation, analyze it, and create a possibilities list. For starters you say that your loss of weight has become unappealing, and that to me sounds like you have excess/flabby skin left over from the stretching during your weight gain. There are many treatments that can help in small increments Explanation Of Loose Skin

Now aside from your appearance you also want a relationship! That is one of the most basic human emotions: the longing to have a companion. In fact, there are TONS of people in the same boat as you. (here is where that list i was talking about comes into play).

Here is what i think you should do:
- Go out and have fun. Don't care what people think about you, and just enjoy yourself. Chances are you might find someone who can look at you for you instead of your insecurities.

- (As mentioned in another answer) Try online dating! Online dating sites are a nesting whole for the non go-getters. I'm not trying to be mean here, but it sounds like you are pretty insecure about the way you look and may want to try and emotionally connect with someone before you physically connect with someone!

- Remember there ARE people who will accept you for you no matter what you look like. This being said, a lot of people who are trying to find love are often in the wrong place at the wrong time. You should travel, or even move if you're at an impasse with the area you live in. I used to live in the country-side bible belt where being different was not okay. So? I MOVED!

Also if you need any other help please send me a message!

You're a wonderful woman. You are a very interesting and kind person and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. I doubt you're unattractive. You're beautiful. If you think you're fat then work out and get fit. It'll make you feel like a million bucks! Surgery wouldn't fix it because a person can get a million surgeries until their face is how they want it (if it evens gets how they want it) but by then, their face is already to a point where it's not fixed. Learn to embrace your flaws. Don't try to change who you are. Gain some self-confidence! Love yourself, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! The right one will come before you know it! Stay beautiful.