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    Silent Crescendo posted an update 4 months ago

    Currently dealing with a lot of anxiety in regards to my university courses. Had a pretty bad semester due to starting meds again, motivation and focus going down, feeling lost (like I was questioning whether I was studying the right thing). Because of these things, I missed classes, became behind and didn’t hand in my assignments. Now one of my professors is suggesting that I get a withdrawal from the course, so it doesn’t affect my gpa and I’m worrying about having to retake a different course multiple times. On top of all this, my parents don’t how about my being behind and having a bad semester, and there’s no way I can talk to them about it. They deal with so much already and I can hear the sigh in their voices, whenever they hear bad news (as sweet as they are). Feeling like a failure, like I’m lost and incredibly anxious, with panic attacks on and off the whole day. Agh…

    Mood : Anxious
    • Hi there. I’m gonna try to address all of this and I’ll section it off to try to be neat and clear.

      __WP__
      Personally, I would take the WP if my grade was gonna be bad. It’s hard to pull a GPA up from one bad grade. Yes, you would have to take it again but if you flunk it, you have to take it again anyway. So WP is a positive thing here if you think that you might tank the course. If you’re doing well enough to pass the class but you won’t get an A, then consider these questions:
      (1) are your intentions to go to graduate school? (2) is this a gen ed class?
      If yes, you want the highest GPA you can get because grad school is seriously competitive. If not and it’s a gen ed class, eh screw it, take the B or C and move on from a Gen Ed Class. If this is a main class you might want to look at what the required passing grade is. Some courses require a B to be passing.

      __BEHIND__

    • sorry, kids cut me off.

      __BEHIND__
      Sometimes it is inevitable that we get behind. Life is difficult and complex and overbooked. First things first, make a list of everything you have to do for all of your classes. Then beside each of the things, write the importance like… is this item 10% of your grade? That’s important to know. Then beside that, write your estimate of how long it will take you to complete the item and the due date.

      Now… if you’re going to fight this, let’s fight smart. If you don’t have a google calendar, make one real quick. They’re free and they connect to your phone which is ungodly useful. Now, put on your calendar your classes at the times that they are. This way you block out that time and you can see what times you have left available to take care of the problem of catching up.

      Then start with the due dates… is there anything exceptionally pressing? That’s due right away that you can still get full credit on potentially? Do those first in order from least time-consuming. Then if there is something that is only gonna take you an hour but is days out, put it off in favor of something that is overdue. Arrange all of your assignments into free slots on your calendar, giving yourself breaks between each.

      Breaks are helpful for the brain to cool down and to celebrate. As your complete and assignment, scratch it off the paper that you wrote it all down on. This will help you feel like you accomplished something and it will help you visually see progress happening. The closer you get to catching up, the more momentum you will find you have to get there because you’ll see your success visually and it will inspire you.

      As long as your teachers have been talked to and understand the situation and are willing to work with you and accept late work, then make up ground. It’s not too late. Tough, but not too late. If time is seriously limited, go for the most bang for your buck. Highest point yielding assignments.

      __TALKING__
      Everyone needs support. If you really don’t want to get it from your parents, look into peer groups for support and assistance. Talk to your school about putting you with a higher level student worker. Often times there are people like myself who work for the school. In my Junior and Senior year, I was a tutor and advisor to incoming Freshman. While my job was to instruct in writing, I also listened to their problems and as a fellow student helped them figure out how to get organized and balance all of the stuff they had to do. Many students got caught in situations like yourself. Where they got behind, started to feel overwhelmed, didn’t think they could turn to anyone. I helped them get organized, gave them advice on how I balanced my job and my coursework and volunteering, etc.

      There are people there who can support you. Turn to your school, look to your instructors (they are often willing to sit and talk and advise you), and look to other older students who have probably already been where you are. If you feel you need more help, some schools have a mental health department where you can get free therapy while you are there. Consider that. Some schools also have mentoring programs, see if you can find a mentor to help guide you.

    • __MAJOR__
      Not sure you wanna be in the same major anymore? That’s okay. First things first… your GPA is most important. Get through the rest of this semester. Tough it out. Fight back. Or make a smart retreat. Whatever won’t mess up your GPA or any loans or grants you have.

      Once the semester is over, you will have a break between them. Coming up is summer break. This will give you a little time to really consider what it is you want to do. To visit with family. And then (if you passed your classes alright) you might consider talking to your parents at that point about having had a problem that you powered through but that it has brought up concerns for you that maybe this is not what you want to do with your life. Or you can avoid that if you want to sort it out on your own.

      It’s up to you. But you can take the time to think about what it is you want. To calm down and get some distance from it while you weigh your options. Don’t forget that you can also take some classes that are not in your major in order to try out other majors. That is kind of the goal of elective courses. Try new things that you’re not sure you would be interested in but are curious about.

      Just do it before going to grad school. In grad school (where I am now) you may not take any classes outside of your major. By then you’re supposed to know what you want for yourself.

      I will tell you this… sometimes you may find yourself drawn to something you least expected. I had to take a research course as part of my major. Just one. A beginners course that was required. Everyone told me how awful it was. How hard. No one liked it. I was pretty sure I was going to hate it. Research. Sounds boring. But holy crap. I fell head over heels in love with research on day one of class. I took another research class and loved that too. So I took another. And then I switched into research hardcore and took all research classes and a research track to graduation and now I’m in a research major in grad school.

      All because of one class that opened my eyes to something that I love and am good at. So if you’re not sure, keep doing what you’re doing, but try out other things as well. This way, you don’t lose progress toward your original goal while you’re considering a new goal. Because yes, there are courses and semesters that make you go ”why did I do this to myself?” I have had classes that made me go ”why did I get into research, I am never going to do this EVER again”. And then the moment the class is over and one of my professors went ”Hey you wanna be involved in this research project next semester?” I startled myself and went ”Omg yes I do!”

      Your goal may just be suffering a lack of enthusiasm right now. Take the time to think about it over the summer. Try out some other courses with your major before you switch your major unless you’re sure what you want. And don’t be afraid to shake things up. I have changed my major 3 times. On the 2nd to 3rd time, I decided to double major so that I could get my feet wet in both. Eventually I make the leap into 3 only which led to my specializing in research. But it’s okay to change things. You have 6 years to finish a 4 year degree. So if it takes you another year than you expected, that sucks but it’s okay too. My changing things up, it took me about 4.5 to 5 years to earn my bachelor’s degree. And now I’m doing masters.

      Your journey is yours and no one else can walk it but you. No one else has the right to judge it but you. So don’t fret about it too much. You’ll be alright. Have a little faith in yourself.

      My best to you in all you do.

    • Oli replied 4 months ago

      I’m sure you will find the right subject to study and pursue @shadowstep, please don’t feel down or upset, do work hard and know you will be successful, everything will go your way and things will be OK, you will make all your dreams come true and do fantastic things in life, believe in yourself and you will achieve all your goals, you can do it, keep going and never give up, inbox me anytime if you want to chat or vent, stay strong, you are never alone :) (hugs)

    • Awww…thank you so much @Tomorrow. That was incredibly helpful and sincere. It means a lot to me that you took the time to reply and try to help out. I will definitely use this advice, moving forward. Thank you, once more. :D

    • Thank you for the support, @Oli. I really appreciate it and will keep you in mind, if I need to talk to someone. :)

    • All good. Good luck with the rest of your semester! Feel free to keep me informed on how it’s going. Also, if you want any ”fun apps” for organization, I’m definitely the guy to talk to lol. Take it easy!