I felt like I have come so far but last night I slipped and with everything going on I needed an escape. The pain was unbearable. I hadn’t self mutilated in so long I forgot how good it made me feel. I shouldn’t have done it but I needed a way out. A way to escape what’s going on around me. View
When I was 4 I was raped and sense then I have been sexually assaulted by two other men, but that's not the problem. The problem is my past. I can't seem to let go of what happened between my parents. My parents lost us kids to DHS almost 9years ago. My mom went to rehab and sobered up but my dad never did. He wanted my mom to kill herself with him. Well after the court took my father's rights I went 4 years with no contact from him then one day he messaged me saying he loved me and everything but my mom had a new boyfriend, who recently purposed, and I wanted the father daughter relationship with him that I never did with my father. Now I have my family telling me to just get over him and my father is telling me how bad my family is and how they brain washed me. I know I suffer from abandonment issues which resulted from several important people leaving me. I just need help figuring out what to do.