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    Maha posted an update 8 years, 3 months ago

    I’m just gonna lay it out there, cuze I’m SO HAPPY and idc if nobody reads this! And I realised I hadn’t been happy in a long long LONG LONG time. I’m on a rollercoaster with a Johnlock fanfic! LORD! I so love good writing! I just realised how still my life is. How little emotions besides depression and dull content sway inside me. I hadn’t laughed SO HARD nor felt so DESPERATE in a along time… I had never been so– BIPOLAR! A word I would never use to describe my monotone universe! Because this fic is real, it’s not cliche, it’s not typical boy meets boy, it’s not merely them falling in love. EVEN THEIR LOVE IS WEIRD. NATURAL, is a better word. It’s inconsistent! Like the hormones of a teenager. It’s inconvenient! And it’s just how it is! IMPERFECTLY PERFECT! This is probably why I love this fanfic so much, it’s not a fanfic. It’s almost an original. A story. If she writes a romantic drama book, I’ll be the first to read it. This is what keeps me from having a mental breakdown. If I myself feel nothing, might as well borrow! I had been for years looking at myself in the mirror with tears till I memorised every line on my face. On this very rare occasion I left a heartwarming chapter to wash, and I couldn’t get enough of my laughing face nor was I able to stop laughing and giggling like a maniac– or a fangirl. I bet you all have that one fanfic/story that really makes you happy and cry. ”I Can’t Help Falling In Love With You” by johnandsherlocks is exactly that to me now. It’s not pointless. The ’mature’ rating is not porn. It is simply life, and life is not as simple as to be for general audiences or teens and above. She/He GETS what a fanfic is all about. Teens are on swifter grounds than everyone else. Ah life, you’re such a bitch to me but now YOU ARE ON A ROLL! So glad I took reading as a side hobby. It’s now officially a main hobby.

    Mood : Happy
    • I’m so happy to see that you finally finding your happiness and feeling that great about life @maha I hope you keep feeling great and I wish you the best :)

    • It’s fabulous to see you happy and upbeat @maha, it’s good you have found something that puts a smile on your face, keep going forward and keep being brilliant, you can do it, I’m always here if you ever need to chat, message me anytime, my inbox is always open, stay strong, you are never alone :) (hugs)

    • @Oli Thx dear x”D Though I probably almost died from all the angst all the same.. It’s a good kind of crying! I love that I’m experiencing those emotions. It’s a very curious thing, happiness!

    • @mariko Thanks! I’m happy to find happiness as well, matter of fact. Even if it doesn’t change that happiness to me barely exists beyond the covers of a book, it certainly is great that I possess them nonetheless. Like a lantern in the dark.