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    Silent Rain posted an update 9 years ago

    Today my doctor prescribed me anti-depressants. He and my therapist have agreed I need that because I have a severe depression. Now I have to take one of those every morning with breakfast. I don’t even eat breakfast ever, but my doctor told me to change that. I already lack an appetite and now I’m supposed to eat breakfast? As if the medication isn’t annoying enough. I hate all these changes. I wish I would have died last night. I should have cut deeper.

    Mood : Dark
    • Rain replied 9 years ago

      @risingarpeggio I haven’t had a decent eating pattern in years, because my mother never cared. I never had stability when it comes to that. I tried multiple times to get a decent eating pattern, but when I try to watch it, all I do is eat lesser and lesser. I keep feeling back into old habits. I’ve never been able to handle changes well. I need my structure. I know you care, but you shouldn’t. It would be better if nobody would because I’m not going to last. I don’t want anyone to be hurt from that.

    • Rain replied 9 years ago

      You have no idea how I cope with changes and what they do to me. I need my structure and it’s difficult to change something. You’re not me, so you don’t know. So you’re saying I should change? I was going to say ”why not accept me for who I am?” but that would be wrong because I don’t accept who I am, so I don’t have to expect others would.

    • Rain replied 9 years ago

      The first part felt like a small attack, but that’s probably just me and my thoughts. I know you have good intentions, but I’ll be fine. I don’t need anyone parenting me. I’ll figure it out. Of course I feel drained, that’s one of the joys of being depressed.

    • Hina replied 9 years ago

      I don’t know You, Rain. I’ve just got here. But I have to say, I absolutely love You! After all, those, who always try to help, suffer the most. So You have my symphathies. Please listen to yourself only. Because it’s the only person that can fully understand your condition. My blessings, Dear!

    • Rain replied 9 years ago

      @eoween Thanks for your words.