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I have an article here from psychotherapist Gwen Randall-Young:

Worrying About What Others Think of Us

Do you ever worry about what others think of you? Many people are plagued by such worries and may be immobilized—fearing to do anything because someone may not like it, or may judge them. Others become obsessed with replaying the past, wishing they had said or done things differently, because they assume they “did it wrong,” and others took note of that “fact.”

Worrying what others think can be damaging to our sense of self and our self-esteem. It can create stress and anxiety, which in turn can affect our physical health. Life ceases to be enjoyable, because we are always second guessing ourselves. Further, we may not even be living our own life, for we may instead be being the person others want us to be.

It is not surprising that many find themselves with this dilemma, because so much of our upbringing and culture is geared towards making us into someone who thinks, acts and behaves as parents, teachers or retailers want us to. We may have been punished, criticized or rejected for being ourselves.

We have each been given a life to live, and a mind that can think about that life. We were designed to think independently, unlike flocks of sheep or birds. Many of the greatest accomplishments by humans were created by those who followed their own minds, wherever that led them, and did so in spite of criticism or lack of acceptance.

It would seem to me that everyone else must have enough on their own plate without worrying what we are doing with what is on ours. And we probably have enough on ours without worrying what anyone else thinks about us.

Remember, what others think of us is none of our business, unless we choose to make it so…but that would be a complete waste of time and energy. We all have better things to do.

Copyright © Gwen Randall-Young, All Rights Reserved.