I confessed being suicidal to my father today after he had asked why I had been so different lately. He told me that I had an amazing life, a supporting family and almost anything I could ever want. He asked what more I could need. I was silent. Not because he was right, but because I knew he wouldn’t understand. After a few seconds of silence he began to tell me how he knew I couldn’t answer and that I was doing this all for attention. He has always done this…acting like he’s always right…and never letting me defend myself without accusing me of talking back. Today was no exception…and I knew that if opened my mouth that he would do nothing more then punish me and tell me to stop lying…but I didn’t care. He was making his dramatic exit, as he always does, when I stopped him. I started screaming at him as loud as I could. I stop and neither of us said a word. I began crying. He walked toward me to comfort me but I backed away. I soon was able to compose myself. I looked at him and simply said ”When you’ve lost the one thing you love the most, not matter what or who you have, it feels like you have nothing. When you’ve lost your other half after being together for a year, you start to realize not only how much you love them but how much they truly complete you…Dylan was and still is my everything…and I don’t want to live on this earth without him.” I left the room and went to curl up in my bed and fall asleep. The fight was over…and though I made my point without being called a liar, I still lost…because I’m still laying in my bed, alone, cuddling my pillow and wishing it were him.