Layla Ramadhani said 9 years, 2 months ago:

I have a best friend. she said she is a lesbian. i am okay with that thing. but we have a rule in our religion that we can’t be. that’s against the rule.
and then, her parents don’t know about this, and everyone don’t know about this except me and her brother.
so what should i do? she keep hiding everything from everyone. like if a problem is like 1-2-3-4-5 she’s hiding the 1-2-3-4 and there’s no 5 (the lesbian things). because if the 5 is revealed… i don’t know what will happen next.

Somebody help me?
thank you :-)

Rain said 9 years, 2 months ago:

It’s her choice whether she tells everyone or not. That’s not your decision to make. It must be difficult for her to come out as a lesbian, especially when it’s forbidden in her religion. How would you feel if you were standing in her shoes? I’m also confused about your title. Do you mean it’s a torture for you? It’s clear that she told this to you in trust and the best you can do is support her. Be her friend.

Layla Ramadhani said 9 years, 2 months ago:

so everyone in school knew us that we’re bestfriend. and then everyone is getting “really-want-to-know” since she always kept that as a secret from she was 13 years old. and she just said it to me like 3-4 months ago.
in school they really want me to speak up about that, but i can’t. if i said it, she’ll mad at me. but i know i am her bestfriend and bestfriend will stand for each other no matter what…
and also everyone in school starts asking me “hey did she’s a lesbians? she looks like” all i can say is keep silent because… i won’t tell the truth.

Rain said 9 years, 2 months ago:

The people in your school should not ask you if she’s a lesbian. If they really want to know, they should ask her. Are you worried people would think that you’re a couple with her? It’s not your place to speak up about that. It’s her secret, not yours and the people in your school shouldn’t be pressuring you to give them an answer.

rinseandrep said 9 years, 2 months ago:

You can play dumb, giving non-answers like “What??? Being a lesbian is prohibited by our religion!” or try to think what you would say if you actually didn’t know anything about how she was born the way she is.

Also, if a selfish argument can be more convincing, remember that ‘snitches get stitches’, this isn’t just about possibly outing your friend, it’s also about how you could show in a second to everybody in your school how you can’t be trusted with sensible information. Do you want people to begin ceasing talking when you get near them?

Deleted User said 9 years, 2 months ago:

What has the most repercussions for your friend? Sometimes when people are part of a particular religious group that has a defined view of sexuality they can be pretty closed minded. This can make them prone to violence against those whom that they feel has offended their god. I understand that we are not the masters of our own sexuality and have no choice as to what or who that we are sexually attracted to. But at the same time I understand that everyone is not in a safe position to make their sexual preference known without becoming a target for violence. i think that from that perspective, your answer should simply be that you have no idea since neither she nor you are each others sexual partner and that you feel that is none of your business. I think that everyone should have the right to express their sexuality but sadly in some cases it is better to keep it to yourself at least until you can get out of the situation where it must be hidden for safety. I hope that you and your friend exercise caution and stay safe. I wish you both luck.

OpenTalk said 9 years, 2 months ago:

I’ll echo Ed’s comments and also reiterate that what your friend needs most right now is for you to have her back. This is who she is and you were special enough for her to share that with. Don’t let her down.