I always struggle on a site like this with my words, because of fences. There are two kinds of fences around us – fences we put up (most often to keep others or things out), and fences others put up (to keep us in). Sometimes it is hard to tell which is which. Sometimes these fences feel like prisons, sometimes they are more about safety. The problem is I don’t know your stories, and which fences you have around you, and often we don’t even know which is which ourselves. The guy in prison for murder whispers through the fence “I am innocent. You have to break me out…” and he seems so sincere, so truthful. The person in the psych ward says the same thing “They are so mean to me here, I hate this place”. The first prison was to keep us safe on the outside, the second was to keep the individual safe on the inside.
So, I am sorry if I seem to be labeling your fences as one kind or the other and you think I am way off base. I don’t mean to judge, I mean to help. Some fences need to come down, some need to stay up, some need to stay for now for a future coming without them.
I suppose the biggest thing is to find your rock, that thing you can stand on firmly. Don’t build on sand, it always shifts. From a firm foundation you can deal with fences.
What is your rock? What is a solid in your life that you can focus on?