 Passing Stranger
873 QA Reputation102 | Maggie said 8 years, 9 months ago: Hi! I know some of you will probably think this question is very immature, stupid, senseless, etc. But remember not everyone has the same principles, believes, education.
So, my questions is: Why do men that are in a serious relationship what porn? I’m not going into any details because I would like too see as many versions possible. You can answer as in many scenarios you want like: “If he watches “porn” you made…..”; “If he searches for…..” etc, etc…
It’s something I have never lived with and I’m trying to understand. But (no offense) try to target your explanations only to heterosexual relations, if there’s even a difference. | |
 Newbie
0 QA Reputation0 | Deleted User said 8 years, 9 months ago: I’m in a serious relationship and he watches porn. Sometimes we watch it together (although I am not much of a fan). I’m not a guy so I don’t know exactly what men get from porn but I guess it’s just something they enjoy. If we’re away from each other for a while I can understand it quite well.
Sometimes it’s to get knew ideas, I know our sex life wouldn’t be the same if he didn’t watch porn. It doesn’t bother me that he watches it because I know he’s loyal to me.
I reckon it’s because guys grow up with porn and they just don’t want it out of their life completely. | |
 Common Friend
19977 QA Reputation752 | mariko said 8 years, 9 months ago: I believe it’s because it’s something they do since very young. Also porn has alot of different “genres” I guess you can call it that way, so they can watch pretty much anything they want to, whaneaver it’s out of curiosity or a fantasy.
Also I agree with the person above, they also watch porn to get different ideas for the relationship.
I believe that watching porn isn’t bad, as long as your boyfriend isn’t addicted to it | |
Passing Stranger
873 QA Reputation102 | Maggie said 8 years, 9 months ago: But if he masturbates, he’s basically showing that he feels aroused with other girls, wishing to be doing that to them… And it hurts, because we consider that cheating | |
Common Friend
19977 QA Reputation752 | mariko said 8 years, 9 months ago: He’s simply arroused, because obviously touching himself and doing it with you it’s totally different for him.
But if you truly believe that’s cheating, then you need to be honest and tell him you feel that way. Guys sometimes are clueless and you need to be straight forward with them | |
 Common Friend
23049 QA Reputation7397 | rinseandrep said 8 years, 9 months ago: If he masturbated only to mental images (you have no way of knowing if it’s you or somebody else, for sure) would you be ok with it? | |
Passing Stranger
873 QA Reputation102 | Maggie said 8 years, 9 months ago: It was him ho “introduced” me to that definition of cheating…  That’s why it is so confusing. And we are both adults. If he doesn’t feel attracted to me anymore, he could just talked to me about it | |
Passing Stranger
873 QA Reputation102 | Maggie said 8 years, 9 months ago: That’s why I’m interested in knowing as many reasons men have to watch porn, get to know or try to to know what’s going on on their head on those moments | |
Passing Stranger
873 QA Reputation102 | Maggie said 8 years, 9 months ago: One of the many reasons he gave me was because he was looking for any kind of adrenalin, because of the hard time we are going through in our lives. | |
Passing Stranger
873 QA Reputation102 | Maggie said 8 years, 9 months ago: @rinseandrep no, I wouldn’t be ok with it. Because he would still being fantasizing with other women | |
Common Friend
23049 QA Reputation7397 | rinseandrep said 8 years, 9 months ago: I don’t know if you masturbate, and only ever think about your partner when you do it, but regardless, I think you are setting up unreasonable standards for your relationship, where you would literally need to read his mind to feel at peace. People suggest to let other people do whatever they want with their bodies, regarding masturbation, so, what kind of personal work would you need to do to be ok with that? Be it working on self esteem, jealousy, or whatever makes you feel at unrest. | |
Passing Stranger
873 QA Reputation102 | Maggie said 8 years, 9 months ago: @rinseandrep You are right about what you said  But it hurts too much. And by saying this I’m trying to blame someone or whatever, but HE was the one who shared this believe, this definition of cheating. And I was introduced to a new world, I saw he was right. But now, he does that. So, if he considers that cheating and does it anyway…. It’s very confusing | |
 Familiar Face
3323 QA Reputation65 | Otter_Space said 8 years, 9 months ago: For men it’s like second nature. Moreover people say that masturbation reduces the risks of prostrate cancer.. and it helps refresh old sperms; so it’s kinda not that bad if done in a controlled way. You should not feel that bad about it. It’s like.. you have your boyfriend still there are celebs whom you are crazy for, isn’t it? Take it that way! I know it’s kinda lame.. but he isn’t at a fault here either.. it’s kinda natural for boys. | |
Common Friend
23049 QA Reputation7397 | rinseandrep said 8 years, 9 months ago: Can you tell us a bit how did this discussion go down exactly? Did he say something like:
“Hey, does it bother you? I ask because some people consider it cheating, what do you think?” and you said “Oh now that you mention it, yeah it’s cheating!” Or was it something like:
“I can’t stop masturbating I feel like I’m cheating on you I’m so ashamed” A couple defines what is cheating, which can be just whatever happens without the informed consent of the other person. Did you two both explicitly agree that his masturbation is cheating? | |
Passing Stranger
873 QA Reputation102 | Maggie said 8 years, 9 months ago: @rinseandrep we were sharing some points of view about random questions and he said that… I didn’t initiate anything, i didn’t gave “hints” about that subject… anything. It was 100% volunteer from his part | |
