bluesgirl31 said 9 years, 5 months ago:

I’m pretty sure my husband cheated or is cheating. He will not admit it and I’m tired of even trying to figure it out. All signs say he did and is probably still doing so, but I have no real concrete proof. I wish he would just tell me and get it over with so I can let go and move on. That is the only way I am ever going to be able to.

I’m so broken and depressed. I feel like he has broken me into pieces,and took away my confidence and self esteem. He says he loves me, but I just don’t believe him anymore. I think hes faking it. You can’t say the things he has said to me in the past or do the things he has done to me and then say you love me. Its like he has wanted to break my confidence and make me insecure…which if so he has succeeded.

Everyone says leave, that I deserve better. I know what I deserve, I am a grown woman. I know how to walk away. I have done it before very easily. I just want to make sure I make the right decision. I have not been perfect by far, but I have always been faithful and honest to him. He is by far the love of my life.I suppose that is why this has been so difficult because I just can’t picture my life without him, but on the other hand I can’t picture my life with him like this either.

He swears he has always been faithful to me,
I want to believe him so bad but because he lied to me in the past over something simple, I can not get over it. I believe if it was that easy for him to lie to me over something simple, then he will definitely lie over something like this. If I could just find out for sure I know that I would be able to make definite decision. I need that in order to move on either with him or without him.

WanderingCreature said 9 years, 4 months ago:

I understand where you want to make sure you made the right decision, however, no one is worth your tears and if they are, then they won’t make them happen. I would tell him (if you haven’t already) that you need a definite answer and to be brutally honest, I think it would be best if you left.
I know it is hard, but if he won’t admit it then you don’t know if you can trust him, as well, you don’t deserve what he may or may not be doing to you. You deserve someone whom you can be confident will love you as much as you love them.
Worst case scenario, he can always come back to you once you have left him and admit to what he did and you can try to fix things. If not, then he obviously wasn’t worth the pain and be glad you left when you did!

I am very sorry this is happening to you, and I wish you the very best. I am sorry if I wasn’t of much help.

Good Luck <3

Swifting said 9 years, 3 months ago:

Your husband probably loves you. Unfortunately, it doesn’t sound like he loves you in the way or in the manner in which you would like to be loved and supported. That is sad and that is not going to be easy to get over.

You know what you deserve and what you are capable of. I don’t believe having an absolute answer for you if he cheated or not is going to make this easier.

Ultimately this comes down to what you can or cannot live with. Can you live with him knowing he cheated? Can you brave learning to live alone and being an independent person?