torn..

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hi..am an 18 yr old dating this guy..lately things havent really been working out so well..and i feel lyk i cant really connect with my boyfriend..am worried..we’ve been dating for a while about 5 months and am not as happy as i thnk i need to be..he doesnt show me much affection..or tell me sweet stuff..we dont rly express our feelings like that..telling eachother..is this normal?my past relationship was pretty different from that..we’d call eachother alot..tell eachother i love u..n stf lyk tht..bt not in this one..n i dont knw how to tell my bf that am not okay wth all of it..not letting eachother knw about how we feel and being affectionate..am not sure if i shd js end it or not..please help :’(

Category: asked June 5, 2013

2 Answers

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my girlfriend and I had this problem but we've been together for 2 years. relationships are a lot of work and thre will always be something that needs fixed nomatter who you are with. With me, i don't do good with telling my girlfriend how i feel and she doesn't do well with being affectionate. but we know we both just have different ways of showing we care about each other and we try to do so as much as possible. but unless you communicate it with him, he wont know. Maybe you could bring it up subtly . when my girlfriend or i are feeling like we need to be told cute things we just say "tell me something cute" or we joke around and say "serenade me" and then the other will tell them how much we care about them. if after you talk to him he doesnt make an effort (not if he doesnt get better because making an effort counts) but if he doesnt make an effort and ur not happy, dont settle.
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The best thing to do, in my opinion, is tell him how you're feeling. Otherwise, how is he going to know that something's wrong? I know it sucks bringing up stuff that isn't that pleasant to talk about, but wouldn't you rather have an adult conversation with him about this and possibly fixing this? As opposed to just ending it and never knowing what was going on. A good relationship is built on trust and communication. You have to talk to each other, otherwise there isn't much substance. Talk to him. Don't rely on him to just fix it if you haven't told him that you feel this way.