my sister has asperger’s

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Okay, well I have been really pissed recently. You know. School’s been out and about. But it’s family been dragging me down lately. My sister, she has asperger’s but she is just a bitch. So she takes my money, books, clothes, etc just to piss me off and when I tell Mum. Mum doesnt discipline, instead she gave her today $20 for being honest after stealing my fifty bucks and lying to us about it. Then she in completely nutty, like people in my family has actually called her a prick, bitch because she is spoilt and gets away with it and when I retailiate with her, I am the one getting grounded. Then Mum wants me to be friends with her when she beats the shit out of me sometimes, and in front of my friends. She also does it with my brother. I understand it’s sorta to do with her condition, but still. She’s a fucking asshole
Sometimes, I feel like she is out to get me
What do I do? :/

Tags: asked January 23, 2014

6 Answers

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Being one that was diagnosed with that condition (more of a high-functioning autism) at an early age, I think I can be of some help to you.

Depending on the person and severity, it is possible that their way of thinking is unlike someone who is logical/rational. Rather, they may possess egocentric and narcissistic behaviors and attitudes, and sometimes can even be oblivious to how their actions and words affect others.

If she's acting irrational, one thing that helps is redirection. If she's acting one way, turn her attention to something else, something positive in nature. Get her mind off of the current situation. If she's rational and competent, reason with her about things. Try to make her see things in a different way while staying calm in the process. Fighting emotion with emotion is like fighting fire with fire. Also you shouldn't have rewarded her the way you did. You should have given her appreciation and gratitude, rather than money (in my opinion).

Just like anyone else, she needs to develop a sense of right/wrong. You should encourage her to not do those types of things, and her mother should not condone nor reward bad behaviors - good behaviors should be, however. Calling her names will not get you anywhere, so find a different approach. Try to reason with her in a manner that she will understand.

My best advice is to seek help from professionals who specialize in helping families understand and treat people with this condition. They can assess and help your situation more efficiently.

By the way, how old is your sister?
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Tell your mother about the physical abuse, and minimize the time your sister has available to you out of sight of other people; lock your bedroom door, turn on a recording device to get proof of her misbehavior and show it to your parents. They need to see undeniable proof that their daughter isn't just acting out, she is being blatantly abusive.
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Try and connect with her doing something that you both like. Remember that most of the time is the disease speaking, not her.
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That's a tough one, in my family, we hired all the right people to deal with the health and treatment side, but when it comes to siblings the only real answer when it came to sibling violence was which one should live with relatives. If nothing else is working, you may ask to live with a relative, maybe not permanently but once in a while to decompress.
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aw man.. it sounds as if your sister has just been spoiled and without being given any way to deal with the syndrome. I've met plenty of aspies and autistics who are just awesome. And a lot of it has to do with one, their personality in general, and two, the way they were raised.To me, asperger's or not, she just needs a figure in her life who'd teach her instead of spoil her.Perhaps a therapist would be good?
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Hi, My little brother have autism, so i can relate a little bit , he steals and think its no problem with that. and i try many times to tell him that its wrong and everything. But you dont know how she feels inside. i dont tell you that your doing wrong. but have you tried sometime to tell her that you really love her ? its very important for people with special needs to hear that they are loved. i have problem with my brother becouse hes so negative all the time, and i try to teach him how to think more positive in life. and what you think of you will become, and what you think you will get you will get. i hope you someday can get a long with your sister. i know its hard. but try think from her perspektive. i dont say she does right and your mums right and so on, but i think if you try be more poisitive to her and tell her you really love her and show her that. that she will have a better picture in her head everytime she sees you. sorry if im to no help but i can understand you very much and how mad you can be right now. but try plz <3