I’m gay, is he? What do I do?!

Okay, so here’s this guy that I’ve liked for six months and I don’t even know if he’s gay, and he doesn’t know that I am.. We spend time together and he pokes me on Facebook pretty often but I’m scared to ask him in case he’s offended. Is there any way to tell if he’s interested, little signs I can look for? And if not, how do I approach him about his sexuality without it being really creepy? I just don’t want to mess things up with him:( Where, when, how. Like what do I say? Can I be discreet or do I just need to ask him up straight (no pun intended). Any help would be greatly appreciated.

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Dan

4 Answers

4 accepted

Hey there. Well when you follow the signs you'll have to go by stereotypes which I don't suggest but it's your only bet for now I guess. The only real way to know though is yeah if you ask him flat out. How old are you guys? If you're both still in high school he might not admit it if he is. You should come out to him if you feel it's safe to do so, that way he can think about it and maybe feel better about coming out to you if he's gay too. I'm gay btw :)

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HonestBoy

126

Maybe it would be best to just let him know you are first. Simply make a harmless little joke about it. You obviously are capable of it since you did above (no pun intended). If he's not you don't want to lose the friendship so you don't want to pressure him with your feelings towards him. He may respond to the joke in a manor that lets you know. If he does and is gay you go from there, if not then no point pushing and if he freaks he's no friend.

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Unlikeany

619

We're 15. Thing is we don't go to the same school. I'm already out at my school, it's mixed and all my friends are girls so it's worked out ok. But he goes to an all boys school which can be homophobic to say the very least. We see each other weekly, all of us (a group of friends from different schools) go and do stuff every Thursday. Like last week we did bowling, week before that we went for a judo tester lesson. Just different stuff. Even if he comes out in our little group there's only a couple guys that go to his school that would find out but I could shut them up pretty easily.

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Dan

Let him know that you are. Say it nice n casually and see if he asks more about it, or how he reacts to it. If he's a true friend he will stick by you if he's gay or not! :) Good luck :)

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Nugget

232