How do I communicate to my family that I don’t like it when they bash my dad?

If your family does not recognize your feelings and respond positively to the direct statement "I don't like it when you bash Dad in front of me, I still love him.", then your only choice is to just go somewhere else while the Dad-bashing Olympics are in session.

Thank you all. I appreciate the advice, you all are very wise and helpful. :) I will do my best to stand my ground while still being respect, since I do love my entire family.

you know there is no easy way of letting them know that u hate it when the bash him say it loud or soft, u r gonna get the same reaction from them.... so just say how feel... in a nice way. at the end of the day its YOUR Dad and no one can take that away from you or no one should turn u again him. continue to be neutral and love both of parents ok... divorces are difficult but u have to stay strong ok... **hugs**

I think the easiest (insofar such a thing can be easy) way and would be to simply sit down your mother (or whichever adult you feel most comfortable with) when the two of you are on your own. Explain to her that you understand she feels betrayed/doesn't like him/whatever the case may be, but that for any faults he has, he is still your father. Explain that you're uncomfortable with them insulting him like that around you for the same reason. Regardless of who is it at fault. After having done this, which will hopefully tone it down from her side, you can ask her to the rest of the family to tone it down as well.

Alternatively, you could just confront them all at once, depending on what you're most comfortable with. The basic thing is just calmly and rationally explaining that regardless of what happened and who did what, he's still your father and you love him. Which means it hurts you when they talk about him like that.

If that doesn't work, I suppose the only alternative is leaving whenever something like this starts to happen. You could consider doing something like that whilst announcing that you're leaving because you don't want to hear what they're saying - but that's optional.

Good luck!

Tell them if you don't want to hear it. Sit the people who are doing this down and explain to them that you don't want to be in the middle of it. It is not your business of how they would like to treat each other, you are your own independent being. Say that you love them both and don't want to be in the middle of their fighting because you want to stay neutral. Repeat this when they begin telling you things and eventually they surely will understand the message. Just remember to be polite and respectful, they are probably all very hurt and emotional from the situation, it is a drastic life change to go from married to divorced. good luck, hope all goes well!