Help! Girlfriend is threatening Suicide!

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So Ive been with my girlfriend for a little over a month now. She suffers from depression. She goes to a Therapist who according to her she has told everything. I love this girl so much, she told me she had contemplated suicide. We live 25 minutes away from eachother and neither of us have our license. So we can only see eachother on weekends until summer. Her mother was 17 when she had her and neglected her as a child her father was off in the military. When he came back and found out her birth mother wasnt sending her to school he took her and raised her with her mothers parents. She now lives with her father and stepmother. Anyway, she had told me she contenplated suicide, but last week she told me on skype (how we primarily communicate during the week) that she was going to kill herself. I managed to calm her down. But today not 15 minutes before im writing this she had a handfull of pills on skype and was threatening to take them. I again managed to calm her down and she said she could never do it because she is too chicken. I hope thats true but im scared now that every time she wont answer a text or a call that shes gone and done it, what am i supposed to do?

Category: Tags: asked April 29, 2015

4 Answers

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accepted
I would not call the police or tell her guardians without her permission, as she could very likely take that as a betrayal and you could lose her trust, but I would definitely try to get her to tell someone in her home about it or offer to do so yourself while ensuring her that you will not do so without her permission. If she is not willing, and I think you need to give her a little time, trying to convince her, then I would only do so as a last resort... maybe...
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I don't think you have to actually tell someone. You can tell her that if she talks seriously about suicide, you'll tell someone if she doesn't. This will a) show her that you care, and b) push her to tell someone. I'm pretty sure she won't take it as a betrayal of trust because you aren't actually telling someone. I know that I haven't felt betrayed when people threatened to call the police on me because it made me feel like they really care about me and don't want me to hurt myself.
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I think that the only thing you can do is always be there for her, be supportive and understanding, you alone can't keep her from doing it, it's a fight only she herself can win, but you can help by doing just what you've done so far, be there to calm her down and make her feel loved. You can help her activate herself by doing things with her, taking her to places, but be careful to not be too pushy and understand that there are times when she can't bring up the strength to talk to you and that's not your fault!
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Call her father and/or the police as long as you have her adress. It's not your job to be her suicide-hotline, and threatening with suicide is emotional blackmail. If you call her parents, or the police, you'll show her that you take her words seriously and it will make her father and stepmother aware so they can keep an eye on her and make sure she doesn't harm herself.