My father left me and my mother when I was 3. My mother married when I was 5 to my now step father (whom I do not get a long with for several different reasons). Up until about 12 or 13 I didn’t fully understand the whole ‘dad’ thing. My mother did not get along with my biological father, therefore I did not meet him. At about 15 I thought of one day maybe meeting him, but when I was 17, he passed away due to an over dose. So now at 23, with there being no chance for me to meet my biological father, I am trying to fill in the blanks. I am really not sure how to cope with this loss. He had 3 other daughters, that knew nothing about me until the funeral. He was in their lives. I hate that I have missed the opportunity to meet my father and I live with that regret. I have a grudge against both him and also my mother for not making it more of priority for us to meet. I seem to be nervous more often than not.. not sure if this is some sort of mild case of PTSD…
