Am I thinking too much ? Or am I too overly attached ?

Ok,so whenever I was messaging with a friend, if I don’t get a reply soon or on time. I’ll get really paranoid,a little anxious and depressed about it, I’ll think that he might not want to talk to me anymore or find me annoying and a lot of other reasons. But as soon as i get a reply,I feel a lot better. I hate feeling this way, even now I’ve just message a friend of mine and he usually reply me immediately at this time but today he still havent reply my message after an hour. I had this feeling like he may not want to talk to me anymore. Also whenever I talk alot with him and he replied me with just a simple short response, I can’t help to think he’s trying to be nice to reply me and actually doesn’t really bother talking to me at all. Am I being too clingy and overly attached that eventually makes someone doesnt want to talk to me ?

Edit: thanks for the answers guys. It makes me think a lot and I realize that I do have too much time in my hands now since I’m waiting for college to start. Like some of you said, I do feel I wasn’t good enough and I try to always talk about their stuff to keep them talking and interested. And also I don’t have a real life friends to chat with actually, I usually went to chatting sites and exchange our messenger user and chat there because I feel a little lonely and want someone to talk to.

Category: Depression asked June 21, 2014

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Joel

7 Answers

Maybe a little, but I think its because you really treasure your friends. Its just important to remember to just try and relax a little, after all they are your friend. And even if its just a short message, that person took the time to send a message. But its ok to get a little clingy with people close to you. What you feel is more normal then you think and its alright, just try to give a little bit of space so that there is room to breath. Good luck, and relax.

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Luka Cross

Google Social Anxiety. It's exactly what you have. almost 90% of people have it, including myself.

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Ian_mcewen

141

It sounds to me like you are worried you aren't good enough in some way for them, that you have to "live up" to some kind of expectation or they will no longer want anything to do with you, correct?Why do you feel that way? It's important to look at that factor first.Secondly, you seem like a very nice person, I don't see any reason why your friends would not like you anymore just for texting them. I personally would love to get a text from my friends, so I can't see why they'd be irritated by that. After all, you wouldn't be annoyed by that to the extent you'd stop talking to them, right?Take a breath. everything is cool :)

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Darroy

You can have an anxious attachment type, yes. It can also be a sign that you don't have a full enough life to occupy your thoughts in the time it takes the other person to reply. So try to keep yourself more occupied, with things, other people, hobbies, so you can aim for that balance where you can think "they will reply when they have time, I'm ok with it". Sites like meeetup.com can show you what groups are active in your area to meet more people through an interest, and language exchange sites like Interpals, Italki, Verbling, can put you in contact with other people wishing to practice your language, and text/call.

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rinseandrep

7,397

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I don't think that you're being to clingy, everybody gets that way when it comes to sending a text message, and sometimes people don't like texting and prefer talking face to face, that's how my one friend was. You could ask him if u wanted.

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Prettyangel197

137

I don't think that is considered as clingy, clingy is more like "want to do everything together", as for social anxiety isn't it "concern to be judged or evaluated by others"?. I think what you have is feeling too deeply with your friend, i get that exact feeling if i text the girl i like, is it possible that you like this person?

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Parash

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Thinking too much is normal exactly . As example , you are texting with a person and if you are a fast texter you will get angry or a little paranoid when they doesn't reply it as soon as possible right ? You will thinh that the person doesn't like you , didn't want to talk to you or whatever reason ..

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Hippo :3

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