Those thoughts are common in major depressive disorder, more commonly known as depression. There are many approaches to treating depression. Therapy can be quite helpful; a skilled therapist can teach you coping strategies that you can use when those thoughts arise. Medication is also a possibility. There is unnecessary stigma surrounding medication; many people fare far better with medication than without. I encourage you to reach out to those close to you. It can be hard to talk about such feelings, but knowing how much people care can help a lot. Things would certainly not be better without you; talking to those people will show you that. If you are ever in crisis, you can call the national suicide hotline at 1-800-273-8255. Hang in there; there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I promise you that.