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    mariko posted a new activity comment 1 week, 2 days ago

    In reply to: Spectrolite7 posted an update feeling a bit tensed today, I hope I can relax… all is well. View

    @spectrolite7 hope things get better ! And if you need help you can always talk to me if you would like :)

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    mariko posted a new activity comment 1 week, 2 days ago

    In reply to: AndiElizabeth posted an update Almost two and half years of being suicide attempt clean and I’m considering throwing all that progress away. I just don’t know what to do anymore. View

    @meganqweenster don’t give up! You’re doing so well! Fight those negative thoughts with things that make you happy! Also you have the blah community beside you ^^ If you need help and vent you can always PM me or anyone around here. You’re not alone!

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    mariko posted a new activity comment 1 week, 2 days ago

    In reply to: Spectrolite7 posted an update It’s important relax and believe in the flow of the universe and that everything is working in your favor… Your angels and spirit guides are always with you. View

    @spectrolite7 couldn’t have said it better myself. Hope is what keep us going, is how we get our strenght, see positivity and overcome things too. Keep going , you have the right mentality! ^^

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    mariko posted an update 1 week, 2 days ago

    All I want is a conversation. A honest, open minded, long conversation. Aka 1 real friend.

    • I don’t want to see you feeling alone or lonely @marikofujimoto, so many people love and care about you sweetie, I do and so does the BT community, you are a friend to so many of us here Mariko, you can always talk to me about absolutely anything Mariko, inbox me anytime if you want to chat or vent hun, you will be OK, stay strong :) <3 (hugs)

    • don’t know if you still play league, but if you use discord hit me up i’m always down for a conversation if i’m not busy or at work :)

    • @yamoros12 I do actually. Remember me of your ING and your name on discord pls? Thanks :)

    • @oliver thank you for the support Oli. Just has been incredibly hard lately

    • @marikofujimoto it’s dearestchelly#8486 on discord, but im on oceanic server for league though

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    mariko posted a new activity comment 1 week, 5 days ago

    In reply to: Oli posted an update The past couple of days have been difficult for me, on a personal note, my sadness is still with me but I’m trying to stay positive and fight it as best I can, I recently lost a dear friend to […] View

    @oliver you couldn’t have done anything Oli. You helped that person as much as you could , that decision was made from that person, not your fault. And I’m sending you much love, so sorry for losing your friend. Wish I could give you a huge hug.
    Also thank you for the lovely message, I hope everyone keeps this message close to their minds and…[Read more]

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    mariko posted an update 2 weeks ago

    Since I can remember I’ve always tried to help people cause I believe everyone needs a listener and also some advice (if they ask for it) . However, when I need someone that I can call friend, I find myself alone once again. 22 years and I never felt so out of this world. Maybe my life will really be just books and no human interaction. Where is…[Read more]

    • Oli replied 2 weeks ago

      I don’t want to see you feeling alone @marikofujimoto, you are such a lovely, compassionate, kind and amazing soul Mariko who deserves to be surrounded by all the things that bring her hope, happiness and joy, please know I’ll always be here for you hun and so will many others, the BT community cares about you and so do I, your friendship and…[Read more]

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    mariko posted an update 2 weeks, 2 days ago

    If I wasn’t so depressed , anxious and busy with classes, I would attempt to get a job to get out of this house as fast as I can.
    I miss being myself, that girl that was super positive, creative, happy. Because I have a family that get angry at the minor thing I say, that don’t even try to understand specially when I’m nice, and to help…[Read more]

    • I don’t want to see you feeling sad, upset or down @marikofujimoto, I want to see you smiling and making each day as positive as you can sweetie, shine and know creativity and happiness will come into your life hun, your family should give you all the support and encouragement in the world Mariko, surround yourself with compassion, brightness and…[Read more]

    • @marikofujimoto you’re special, you’re worth respect, love and compassion, Any judgement on you is a judgement on themselves. Don’t take them seriously, you can enjoy life. They’re the one’s who have lost their way. Take each day easily, cherish every moment, this moment right now can be taken, especially by all the negative experiences that…[Read more]

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    mariko posted an update 3 weeks, 1 day ago

    Aside of that hope everyone is having a good day/night

    • Hope you had a good day @marikofujimoto, smile and always be the incredible, kind and lovely angel that you are Mariko, remember you are beautiful and perfect sweetie, inbox me anytime if you want to chat or vent, stay strong, you are never alone :) <3 (hugs)

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    mariko posted an update 3 weeks, 1 day ago

    Whateaver you do, never compare siblings. Is hurtfull.

    • Indeed @marikofujimoto, we all deserve to be treated equally with love, care and respect sweetie, I don’t want to see anyone being mean to you or comparing you to others, you are beautiful and special Mariko, what’s on your mind hun, I want to see you smiling and feeling fabulous, inbox me anytime if you want to chat or vent, stay strong, you…[Read more]

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    mariko posted an update 3 weeks, 6 days ago

    Another meltdown yesterday and a stop to the hospital. Too much on me lately.
    And to help today my sister is having the worst attitude ever. Why? Stuff was going so well…

    • I don’t want to see you feeling down or upset @marikofujimoto, you are such a beautiful, special and kind angel who deserves to have a smile on her face sweetie, hold your head up high Mariko and don’t let anything or anyone bring you down, your sister should treat you with love and respect, remember so many people on BT care about you and so do…[Read more]

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    mariko posted a new activity comment 4 weeks, 1 day ago

    In reply to: silveRose143 posted an update Update:I am now 40 weeks and I’m in so much pain but whenever I call the doctor or nurses, they’ll tell me that it’s all normal and that when my contractions comes, ”I’ll know”. […] View

    @silverose143 Those doctors aren’t explaining shit to you. I’m supposing you’ll be giving natural birth. If I’m right it means you have to dilactate (hopefulyl saying the word right). It can take several hours with quite alot of pain. However if you’re REALLY hurting, go to an hospital. It should hurt but not feeling like you’re dying. In…[Read more]

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    mariko posted an update 1 month ago

    The day didn’t go bad, actually was pretty good. Let’s see how tomorrow will be. Goodnight everyone

    • Oli replied 1 month ago

      It’s wonderful to see that you had a wonderful day @marikofujimoto, sleep well and get a good rest sweetie, I’m sure tomorrow will be fantastic Mariko, stay positive and keep going, you can do it, inbox me anytime if you want to chat or vent, stay strong, you are never alone :) <3 (hugs)

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    mariko posted an update 1 month ago

    First latin class tomorrow. Will be a bit later (at 10 am) , for some reason the teacher will be busy before, meaning only 1 hour of class. But still nervous af. Wish me luck…

    • Oli replied 1 month ago

      You’ll do great in your Latin class @marikofujimoto, work as hard as you can, stay positive and know you will be successful sweetie, smile and keep going forward, you can do it, inbox me anytime if you want to chat or vent, stay strong, you are never alone :) <3 (hugs)

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    mariko posted an update 1 month ago

    Talking to my bf till 2 am ,crying and etc, I realised my past still hunts me ALOT. I had 20 years of bullying pretty much ( I was already bullied at 3 years old basically) , super abusive relationships, bullied for looks and ironically for having good grades… and I guess I grew cold and started to hate people. So is really hard now to feel…[Read more]

    • Oli replied 1 month ago

      You are such a beautiful, kind and lovely angel who deserves happiness and all the best that life has to offer @marikofujimoto, don’t let your past get you down or stand in your way sweetie, I was bullied in high school and from personal experience, I know how bad the effects of bullying can be, I don’t want to see you feeling sad or upset because…[Read more]

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    mariko posted an update 1 month ago

    Can’t stop crying today. No matter how much I try to talk to people, even those who care about me, I never feel warmth from them. They never fully understand me. I genuinly feel like I’m alone in this world. I only have books and my shows. And in the end, only I understand myself.

    • Oli replied 1 month ago

      I don’t want to see you feeling upset, sad or alone @marikofujimoto, please know so many people care about and love you Mariko, be kind to yourself because you are truly a beautiful, lovely and special angel, surround yourself with all the things that bring you hope, I want to see you smiling because you are amazing inside and out, I wish I could…[Read more]

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    mariko posted a new activity comment 1 month ago

    In reply to: Spectrolite7 posted an update I dislike that i even speak about the dark emotions because i hope im not creating more of it… My intention is to release it out of my system…. And to find a solution, its not to […] View

    I think you just have too much going on in your head and around you. You even mentioned phone and electricity. Try to get away from your phone and computer. Go for a walk, buy some food you love, find any excuse to go out and get fresh air and look around you. Being stuck inside home is the worst you can do now. Also talking about how you feel is…[Read more]

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    mariko posted a new activity comment 1 month ago

    In reply to: Spectrolite7 posted an update I feel stuck.. I dont know what to do. I ask fot help and i dont see anyone wanting to help… I think im in this alone… All i can do is lay down and sleep my life away while i wait. I […] View

    I can help, always here for anyone who needs to vent

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    mariko posted a new activity comment 1 month ago

    In reply to: Spectrolite7 posted an update I wonder if I’ll have the guts to cut myself… I have a need to release the pain… I have to get a sharp object and just do it… This pain is like unbearable… I have to get my sharp […] View

    I agree you should find a way to release the pain, but cutting is never a solution. It damages your body (let’s be real, for long term) and damages things like self esteem aswell. Do something positive: workout, draw, write, play guitar, sing, anything and hand your heart to it, hell even cry you know? Anything except cutting. You need to face…[Read more]

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    mariko posted a new activity comment 1 month ago

    In reply to: mariko posted an update When you find out you’ll have a Latin class *screams* But for real, aside of that I’m super excited. My degree is genuinly all about history, geography, languages and specially Literature. […] View

    Thank you so much Oli , you’re always so supportive :)

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    mariko posted a new activity comment 1 month ago

    In reply to: mariko posted an update When you find out you’ll have a Latin class *screams* But for real, aside of that I’m super excited. My degree is genuinly all about history, geography, languages and specially Literature. […] View

    :c oh no, I hope mine are better then… A bit scared of that class

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