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    mariko posted an update 2 days, 8 hours ago

    Is so frustrating and disappointing to live under people’s words. They promise you the world, and you believe. In the end you get hurt, disappointed, you feel like a joke…
    In the end you really only have yourself. You can call it selfish but is the only way to live in this world.
    All I need is myself. I don’t need anyone. You can keep your…[Read more]

    • Anyone who makes promises to you should always be there to help and support you no matter what @marikofujimoto, those who lie to you or betray you aren’t worth it hun, I want to see you being surrounded by compassion, love, empathy and kindness, please know so many people appreciate you Mariko, you truly deserve friendship and to have a strong…[Read more]

    • @oliver you’re 100% right

    • I completely understand and I live by this, too because it’s the only way to.

    • I completely understand and I live by this, too because it’s the only way to.

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    mariko posted an update 2 days, 14 hours ago

    The most frustrating thing in this world, is you thinking your loved ones also love you. Anyone is able to throw beautiful words at you, but action? Very few people can. Stop understanding their excuses.

    • You are such a compassionate, kind and beautiful angel who deserves to feel cared for, appreciated, loved and acknowledged @marikofujimoto, your family should support you and always be there for you no matter what Mariko, please be kind to yourself and know so many people are here for you, I am and so is the BT community, those around you should…[Read more]

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    mariko posted an update 6 days, 11 hours ago

    To anyone that thinks depression and anxiety have an on/off switch, fuck you. Actually fuck you.
    Don’t talk to me, don’t even show up in front of me.
    As someone who struggles with this since very young, as someone who has been on meds and as someone who has a therapist, I’ll will say fuck you. Is not a matter of “oh you can be happy if you…[Read more]

    • Focus on making yourself feel happier and positive emotionally and mentally @marikofujimoto, others really should give you advice that will truly helps you and makes you feel listened too, acknowledged and heard Mariko, anyone who judges you or is ignorant of mental health and the struggles you go through isn’t worth it sweetie, please don’t give…[Read more]

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    mariko posted an update 1 week, 3 days ago

    Hate complaining, but I don’t know what else to do. I don’t know how to feel happy. Everything is so dark.
    Doesn’t help I live in this stupid little pathetic town, where everyone is cruel, judgmental, that are always gossiping, and the cherry on top of the cake is that I’m terrified and angry I’ll see my abusive ex and his family.
    I try to…[Read more]

    Mood : Depressed
    • I don’t want to see you feeling upset, down or sad @marikofujimoto, I want to see you positive and upbeat Mariko, I’ve been worried about you sweetie, you are such a beautiful, kind, compassionate and incredible angel who deserves all the happiness and joy that life has to offer, someone like you who is so special doesn’t deserve to be abused…[Read more]

    • Hi Mariko,
      I am sorry to hear that you’re going through such a rough time right now. Are you currently seeing anyone, a psychologist, about the issue? What kind of coping strategy are you utilizing presently? I am sorry that I am not more of a help right now. If you want to talk more in-depth about the situation, I am more than willing to listen…[Read more]

    • I am here for you! I am so sorry you are going through this ♥♥ I send you my love. You can get through this♥

    • @tomorrow I do have a therapist yes. I’ve been on therapy since January of this year.
      Is helpful but is only 1h a week so doesn’t even cover 5% of my problems.
      Is the only thing I can have right now, is the only free resources from the state.

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    lilwisher93 and Profile picture of marikomariko are now friends 4 weeks, 1 day ago

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    mariko posted an update 4 weeks, 1 day ago

    I want to die. But then i don’t. I do. I don’t. Back and forth.

    • Please don’t think like that @marikofujimoto, you are such a beautiful, special and lovely angel who deserves all the happiness in the world sweetie, don’t let life’s struggles get you down Mariko, death will not solve anything hun, I want to see you truly happy and living a life where you feel content, positive and fulfilled, so many fantastic…[Read more]

    • I feel… I am here for you 100% if you never need to rant, get advice or talk to someone ♥ serious

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    mariko posted an update 1 month, 1 week ago

    because I’m turning 23 today x)

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    mariko posted an update 1 month, 1 week ago

    Where do you turn when you become desperate?…
    Don’t know if I should drink, if I should cry or scratch my skin to the point it relieves some pain away…

    • Please don’t let sadness, depression and pain get you down @marikofujimoto, I know how you feel sweetie, it may be hard to see through all the darkness, but you will make it through this and so many more brighter, happier and positive days are ahead for you Mariko, everything will be OK, you are a survivor who deserves all the best out of life,…[Read more]

    • I’m here if you need someone to talk to, Mariko. Please don’t hurt yourself. It can be difficult to be and remain optimistic during dark periods, but it is not impossible. You are an amazing and strong person, and you can get through this. I believe in you.

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    Dalia changed their profile picture 1 month, 1 week ago

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    Dalia posted an update 1 month, 1 week ago

    Uh, it’s been a long time. Hey folks, I’m back. for a bit at least

    Mood : Indifferent
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    mariko posted an update 1 month, 2 weeks ago

    Second panic attack since therapy started and happened in the hospital last night.
    Was a very hard night.
    Lately has been so hard, so much on my shoulders.
    I’ve been working very hard to be positive but family is always upset, so much crap to study, then I have my birthday and my family won’t celebrate it neither do I have a present.
    I’m just…[Read more]

    • Please keep fighting and never give up @marikofujimoto, you will beat all your struggles and come out so much stronger sweetie, I want to see you truly smiling and making each day lovely Mariko, try to stay upbeat and positive Mariko, you can do it, do have a happy birthday and keep going Mariko, everything will be OK, I believe in you, please…[Read more]

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    mini_beethoven posted an update 1 month, 2 weeks ago

    Confirmed diagnosis and am starting ACA meetings. I hope this can help me from not being able to sleep. Went off of my antidepressant also, and I am more emotional but I know I need to work through my emotions. Still have my antianxiety in case I need it.

    • Hope going to the meetings truly help you and make you feel happier @kittymew, I want to see you positive and making each day as incredible as you can, do find good ways to get your thoughts and emotions out, don’t bottle things up, remember you are a wonderful person who is deserving of all the brightness that life has to offer, everything will…[Read more]

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    lilwisher93 posted an update 1 month, 2 weeks ago

    Once again I get into an argument with my parents. Regarding my boyfriend. I happy yet they make these unnecessary comments because I mentioned I am going to hang with him. Some comments should be kept to themselve. They think they know everything about love. Let me enjoy my life.

    Mood : Annoyed
    • I would talk to your parents about your boyfriend @lilwisher93, let them know how happy he makes you and that he cares about you, hopefully once your parents come to meet him, they will see he is a decent person, everything will be OK, stay positive and keep going, you can do it, inbox me anytime if you want to chat or vent, stay strong, you are…[Read more]

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    mariko posted an update 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Tired of feeding my own stupidity and dreams that won’t and shouldn’t become true.
    If I was harsher with people maybe I would get genuine respect and love back.

    Mood : Cold
    • Do follow your dreams and don’t let anything or anyone stand in your way @marikofujimoto, always be the kind, compassionate and beautiful angel that you are Mariko, I want to see you being treated with love, care, respect and dignity hun, you are such a special person who great things will happen too, believe in yourself and keep going forward…[Read more]

    • Always follow your dreams and never give up, you deserve love and respect for who you are, don’t change that. :) Celebrate your own uniqueness! Always

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    mariko posted an update 1 month, 4 weeks ago

    Weeks and weeks of therapy, self evaluation, alot of hard work, and I still feel like shit. The only thing I’m good at is being a student. That’s it. I’m not creative, although I like writing, I’m not girly, hell I don’t even wear makeup, I’m shitty at the games I play and I’m the worst person ever to socialise with people.
    I can see myself…[Read more]

    Mood : Cold
    • Please don’t let sadness, pain and struggles get you down @marikofujimoto, you are such a beautiful, lovely and special angel who truly deserves all the happiness in the world sweetie, don’t let trauma define you Mariko, you are so much stronger inside and out hun, everything will be OK, you will win all your battles Mariko, so many brilliant…[Read more]

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    lilwisher93 posted an update 2 months ago

    I am feeling a bit dis-stressed right now. There been this huge tension between my family for the last few days due to the fact what my youngest bother has done. I feel like I getting the some of it from them even though I did nothing wrong. For example I tried to help make dinner tonight and I messed up adding the wrong soy sauce to the meat and…[Read more]

    Mood : Depressed
    • Oli replied 2 months ago

      Your family should treat you with all the love, respect, care and kindness in the world @lilwisher93, they shouldn’t yell at you over something trivial and minor, everything will be OK, surround yourself with things that make you happy and keep smiling, remember the BT community will always be here for you and so will I, inbox me anytime if you…[Read more]

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    mariko posted an update 2 months ago

    Really rough week. Alot of emotions. Hanging in there because I have people who would want me to keep going.
    So I’m just dropping this song here for anyone that wants, to me it really helps me to remember why I have to keep going:

    Mood : Anxious
    • Oli replied 2 months ago

      Please keep fighting and don’t let your struggles get you down @marikofujimoto, you are a beautiful, incredible and lovely angel who will make amazing things happen sweetie, don’t let anything stand in your way Mariko, hold your head up high and keep going forward hun, stay positive, upbeat and shine Mariko, I am rooting for you and so is the BT…[Read more]

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    mariko posted an update 2 months ago

    Ended up not going to a festival because had no one to go with. I invited someone but the person decided to go with someone else..
    I know university is just to have my education (which is going great!) but it makes me feel genuinly depressed….
    My therapist keeps saying for me to try but everytime I do doesn’t work…
    Maybe I’m shit at picking…[Read more]

    Mood : Cold
    • Oli replied 2 months ago

      Please don’t feel bad about yourself @marikofujimoto, you are such a kind, beautiful, special and lovely angel who truly deserves good friends around her, I know how you feel, being an introvert and shy myself, it’s so difficult to make friends and create meaningful bonds with people, you are trying your best sweetie, keep going and know you…[Read more]

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    mariko posted an update 2 months ago

    I just read someone saying ”there’s stigma around rapist”. this person flat out said he rapped someone and that there’s stigma. That rappist shouldn’t be forgiven but neither punished.
    You sir are the kind of garbage that shouldn’t consume the oxygen of this world. Be gone.

    Mood : Angry
    • Oli replied 2 months ago

      Anyone who commits such a horrible crime like rape or sexual assault should be punished severely, thrown in jail for a long time @marikofujimoto, survivors of sexual violence are so brave, courageous and strong, hope you are OK sweetie and having a fantastic day Mariko, I want to see you smiling hun and doing well, inbox me anytime if you want to…[Read more]

    • @agm24 I genuinly hope so. I hate that nowdays everything is called a stigma. Wish the world was more kinder and no so ignorant.

    • @oliver couln’t agree more. Is a super terrifying experience and the victims deserve so inner peace knowing justice was made

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    mini_beethoven posted an update 2 months, 1 week ago

    I was diagnosed at my last counselling session with Complex PTSD. I’ve never experienced any trauma or abuse that I know of either. Idk how to feel.

    Mood : Confused
    • I would continue to go to the counselling sessions and see how they can best help you, tell them about your thoughts, feelings and things that have happened in your life @kittymew, remember the BT community will always be here to support you Kayla and so will I, you are a wonderful person who truly deserves all the best, everything will be OK, you…[Read more]

    • @kittymew PTSD usually is severe trauma but sometimes ”light” PTSD can occour from abusive homes or relationships.
      Also remember therapists are humans, they have flaws. Is possible he misdiagnosed you.
      You can always request a second opinion if you are unsure about this

    • PTSD can be very generic, what did you counselor pinpoint the PTSD to, because although its consistent in the population its not generally a generic diagnosis. Can you pinpoint an event in your life when it all started?

    • hey guys. sorry i’ve been busy with school.
      she pinpointed that my parents used to “gaslight” me about my emotions and would pester me past the point of where they should have. It’s technically a form of abuse, but it’s hard for me to accept this because my parents always had food on the table and went to every recital etc. I think they…[Read more]

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