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    Ariella9511 posted an update 7 years ago

    Please bare with me, I need some advice :)
    On Monday afternoon March the 27th, my neighbors’ 14 month old child drowned in the swimming pool. I sadly couldn’t help the child by administering CPR as it was too late. It was a heartbreaking incident.

    The next afternoon, I was scheduled to go for a routine operation procedure to remove 4 of my wisdom teeth and have the jaw bone shaved down. All went okay, I was also fine in recovery, until they wheeled me back into the hospital ward. (I obv don’t remember what happened next but I was told by the ER Doctor and nurses that I had my lungs fill with my own blood which caused me to suffocate and eventually my heart stopped. The on hand nurse managed to press the emergency button and it took 2 ER Doctors & 8 nurses to resuscitate me. I was brought back after a period of 20 min.

    After going through these traumatic events, I feel as though I should have a new found sense of gratitude for life. However, I am plagued with a deep feeling of loneliness and despair :(

    If you were in my shoes, would your outlook on life be changed?

    Mood : Anxious
    • Oli replied 7 years ago

      I’m so sorry about what happened to your neighbours child @ariella9511, please don’t feel sad or guilty Ariella, you tried your best to save them, your neighbours beautiful child is an angel now, do take care of yourself and your neighbour hun, glad you are OK sweetie, take time to recover from your operation Ariella and be grateful to the hospital staff as well, things will work out Ariella, look forward towards a future that is bright and filled with hope, you can do it beautiful Ariella, I’m always here if you need to chat, feel free to inbox me anytime, stay strong, you are never alone :) <3 (hugs)

    • @ariella9511 I think I wouldn’t be surprised to be in the same mood, you have been through a lot and while indeed there’s some gratitude somewhere in the future to be celebrated, that trauma has to be processed first, so don’t ask yourself too much. I hope with times you feel better and for you to talk with somebody about how you feel. :/

    • As someone whom had times where I nearly died once because of my own self and twice because of harm from a guy, I know exactly how you feel. I battled my whole entire life fighting to want to just live and do anything that I feel is best at that moment. I wanted to love, laugh, etc and was very disappointed that life didn’t live up to my expectations. Movies and books make it seem like when you go through traumatic things that you’re all of sudden going to be place with happy opportunities. Truth of the matter, you change and you will keep changing. Never will you be the same. That could be a good thing in time which I am truly hoping for you. It’s not your fault that you feel this way. You are a human! Feel free to message me if you ever feel like talking
      @ariella9511